


Stockholm Syndrome

by wozzah



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: Abuse Awareness, Accurate Timeline in Gorillaz Lore, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst with a Happy Ending, Between 2D and OC, British English, Drug Abuse, Drug Addiction, Drunk Murdoc Niccals, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Especially at This Point in the Lore, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, For OC, Heavy Drinking, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Kidnapping, M/M, Murdoc Niccals is Bad at Feelings, Murdoc is a Complex Character to Write, New York City, Not for Murdoc, Originally Posted Elsewhere, Past Abuse, Phase Three (Gorillaz), Physical Abuse, Post-Phase Five (Gorillaz), Recovery, Romantic Friendship, Slow Burn, Stockholm Syndrome, plastic beach
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:21:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 41,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23586037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wozzah/pseuds/wozzah
Summary: Kidnapped against her will, Juliet Morrinson wakes up to find her world completely upside down when a bastard bassist drags her to an island for his own personal gain.#1 Gorillaz Fanfiction on Wattpad (January-March 2020)
Relationships: Murdoc Niccals/Original Character(s), Stuart "2D" Pot/Original Character(s)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to the rewrite of Stockholm Syndrome.
> 
> There are a lot of changes we are going though with this version of the story, the biggest being that it is no longer written in a "x reader" style. The reader has been replaced with an original character as our protagonist (I'm sorry y/n). I'm confident that while this is a hard change, it's a very good one that everyone will enjoy. 
> 
> Updates will be every Friday, starting on the 14th of February. The updates will include either one chapter or two, depending. 
> 
> Now that that's out of the way, here's the required content warning bullshit I have to state 'legally'.
> 
> This book is meant for a mature audience. 
> 
> There are scenes which depict the following: graphic depictions of violence, mental and emotional sabotage, sexual situations, mentions and depictions of drug abuse/addiction, attempted suicide.
> 
> If you have an questions or concerns, please feel free to leave a comment or message either of us. 
> 
> \- Wozzah and Kevin
> 
> Additionally:  
> Concerning some of the statements surrounding this story started by those who have not read it, both Wozzah and @dear_wormwood would like to clarify that there are no depictions of r*pe. This story is also not meant to glorify abuse, or romanticize abusive relationships. If you'd take a quick moment to read the title of the story, it's called Stockholm Syndrome. If you use context clues or have any basic understanding of the term, you can put together why our protagonist dismisses the antagonist's behavior at times. Murdoc is the villain, not only in the Gorillaz lore, but in this story as well. We love Murdoc as a character and love writing him as his weird and witty self, but we don't condone his actions. That being said we also refuse to sugarcoat the intensity of the situations out of respect of victims like Wozzah, who started this story as a way to cope with her own abuse. If abuse is a touchy subject for you and you have no interest in being educated in the subject through storytelling, then we recommend you don't read it.

My fingers struck the keys with a placid attentiveness.

The euphoric sounds of my song filled the room, drowning out the voices of the busy restaurant's clientele. Each delicate stroke of my hands sounded a harmony of tunes into the air; all of my grief slipping away as I lost myself in the music. Allowing my heavy eyes to shut, the sweet melody cleared the melancholy thoughts from my mind. For the first time in forever, I didn't need to convince myself I was going to be okay. The steady swiftness of my hands made me feel sure of it. In this moment, I felt at peace.

A deep sigh escaped me as my hands pressed the final keys, ending my song. The patrons to my right snapped me out of my daze, the sounds of their gentle applause bringing the corners of my mouth to form a smile. Turning my gaze from them with a small laugh, I flipped through my sheet music quietly, deciding on another piece of music.

"Sounding great, Morrinson."

Hearing Damien Cade's voice brought an icy chill to rush down my spine, and I quickly twisted to my left. He leaned against the grand piano, the dim lights of the restaurant making his appearance scanty. Dressed in rich attire as usual, he wore a dark burgundy suit and turtleneck, a gold necklace resting just above his chest. Our eyes met, and he smiled at me, his grin accompanied by a clean cut beard. Cade had an elegance to him that I admired. Although intimidating; his charming grin, piercing eyes, and deep voice would make any woman swoon. 

Giving him a small nod as a reply, I took a deep breath through my nose while keeping my posture straight. Taking a moment to run his fingers over his beard, Damien's eyes moved to the floor as he refrained from speaking for a few moments. 

"You didn't have to come in tonight." He cleared his throat. 

Keeping my voice at a low volume, I replied politely, "It's really no problem, sir." 

Raising his gaze, our eyes met once again. There was a glimmer of pity showing in his stare as he watched me closely. This small display of compassion was rare behavior for Cade, his usual hostility frightening at times.

"I know it's been a hard couple of months for you, losing someone is never easy, Juliet." He consoled, his deep voice chilling me. "I think I speak for everyone when I say we're happy to have you back."

My eyes closed for a moment, taking in the kindness of his statement. It was a nice thing to hear from him. Cade was a good man deep down, despite the reputation he has. 

"Thank you, sir." I smiled.

Cade's expression changed as he glanced around his restaurant, his jaw tensing for a moment. Before responding, he pulled the sleeve to his suit away slightly to reveal his wristwatch, glancing at the time. My brows furrowed a bit, and his eyes darted to me from his watch.

"It's 9 o'clock." He stated with a sigh. "Why don't you head home for the night, darling?"

"There's really no need—"

"Juliet, I insist." Cade argued, cutting me off. 

The familiar tone of voice told me he wasn't going to take no for an answer, and I shot a grin at him as I shook my head. A sly smirk glided across his face, revealing that cunning smile of his. This man was a sorcerer in another life. 

"Well, if you insist." I exaggerated the last word as I raised my hands slightly.

"There's that smile." He praised, and I rolled my eyes a bit. "I'll see you Monday, my dear."

With that, he made his way towards the back of the restaurant, leaving me alone at the piano. The bustling of the building was drowned out by the familiar feeling of sorrow as it surrounded me. No matter how hard I tried to suppress what I felt, my grieving was not over. 

The after hour rush started filling the bar top as I shut the fallboard of the piano. My gaze moved around the room, the sight of the nightlife draining the last of my energy. I stood from the small bench, grabbing my things before walking to the kitchen. Desperate for a breath of fresh air, I left through the back door without saying goodbye to my coworkers.

The air was cold, and the dark clouds in the sky were lit up from the glow of the city. As I stepped outside, my breath turned into a thick cloud as I sighed upon escaping the restaurant. I felt cool mist hit my skin as I stepped over a pile of yesterday's snow. The conditions were miserable in the restaurant's dark alleyway, only one small street light illuminating from the side of the building.

A glimpse of something moving in my peripheral shot an ice-cold jolt of electricity down my spine. My head shot to the left to find a pile of leaves being separated by the wind. I took a deep breath from my nose. Something felt off, and I could feel myself kick into high alert as I began to slowly walk towards where I had parked my car along the side of the building. 

Taking in my surroundings discreetly, I noticed a large van parked behind the restaurant, one that I had never seen before. My jaw clenched instinctively as I felt my heart skip a beat, the rhythmic pounding returning tenfold with anxiety. I had never felt safe working late hours, especially not when I had to leave from such a dim and uninviting place. Regardless of Solomon's being a few blocks from the local police station, it still irked me to wander late at night, alone. 

I felt a bit anxious as I caught a glimpse of my car, but proceeded to make my way over to it. Walking up to the van, I held my breath and—as if to only startle me further—a man stepped out of the driver's side quickly. Holding in a gasp, I could feel embarrassment fall over me as he shut the door to the van. He held out his hand to flag me down, and I felt my hands ball into fists tightly.

"Can I help you?" I asked the man, my frozen breath making it harder to see his face.

The light of the alley illuminated behind him, casting a shadow over his face. He was taller than me; and he was wearing a hat, and dark clothing. It was hard to make out much more than that, my eyes straining to make out any noticeable features.

"Do you work here?" He responded, his deep and raspy British accent spiking my curiosity.

"Solomon's? Yeah, I do." I cleared my throat, a bit uneasy.

"How's the old man?" The man asked innocently, "I haven't been around these parts for awhile."

"Mr. Cade?" I asked.

"Yeah, Solomon."

"Solomon Cade has been dead for, like... ten years." I forced with discomfort.

"Oh." He simply said, "Well. That's news to me."

"Yeah..." I whispered awkwardly.

"Anyways," his voice rang in my ears, it was full of malevolence, "I have a parcel for a Howards."

My head tilted as he said this, and my mouth dropped open at the name. The man walked to the back of his van before I had the chance to reply, and I watched as he opened the two large doors. My legs instinctively started moving towards my car to escape, but my wicked curiosity kept me in place. 

"I'm sorry?" Was all I could manage, waiting for his response against my better judgement.

"Ah, here it is." He finally answered, hopping out of the back of the van with a small package in hand. "For, Ren Howards."

He held the box out for me to take, and my brows furrowed at the sight of it. Slowly I brought my gaze to his, a friendly smile on his face.

"Do you know a Ren that works here?" The man asked, and I nodded slowly. 

"Yeah I-I did..." My voice faded off as he walked past me, forcefully handing me the package. 

Hearing him open up the driver's side door, I inspected the box I was holding. Tears filled my eyes as I read Ren's name, and I let out a distressed whimper. My purse slipped off my shoulder and onto the ground. There was no return address, or anything for that matter. Just his name.

The man called from behind me, "Is everything okay there, lass?"

"I'm sorry, I don't understand—"

I was cut off as I turned around, the man grabbing me suddenly and forcing a small towel over my face. My screams were muffled as he held me tightly, his hand preventing me from screaming. The light was now shining on his face, and I cowered at the sight. Now clearly seeing the green tint of his skin and his dark-piercing eyes, I began to feel weak. An evil, twisted smile sat on his face as he spoke.

"You will soon, no worries, love."

***

My eyes felt so heavy I considered not opening them.

It was dark, and the room was spinning. My back seemed to vibrate, my limp body falling from side to side. In my delirium, I thought perhaps it was an earthquake. That thought vanished very quickly when I saw two doors with small square windows at the top. Through them, the city was vanishing behind me under the hum of the engine.

Suddenly my eyes shot open, and I sat up quickly. I winced as my head pounded from the sudden movement, and I turned to where the light shone into the back of the van. My eyes met the man's from the rear-view mirror, and my breath caught as the feeling of fear filled my throat. His eyes, they were piercing; one was a dark brown color, the other a deep burgundy red. The sight of them caused me to cower away in fear. His gaze turned back to the road, a smile on his face. 

I struggled to bring my hands to the opening as I realized they were bound behind my back. My hands balled into fists as I tried pulling them apart. Frustration and fear brought me to tears, a small whimper escaping my lips. 

"You're up sooner than I would've liked," his accent filled my ears as he threw a can into the passenger seat, "Cheap knockoff shit." He muttered. 

"Let me out!" I screamed as I continued to try and pry my hands apart. 

"We're almost there." He hummed with malevolence, ignoring my plea. 

My eyes scanned the back of the van wildly, looking for anything of potential use. As I turned to try and look through a cardboard box, the car turned, throwing me onto my back. I opened my eyes once more to see the back doors. Scooting closer to them, I reeled my leg back and took a breath before kicking the right door as hard as I could manage. 

As my foot slammed on the door a surge of pain shot through my leg, the corners of my vision whitening. Vulgarities escaped at the top of my lungs as I writhed around pathetically in pain, a fire burning in my calf. I examined it through my sobs, noticing a large prominent bruise of a frightening purple color.

"Didn't think it would be that easy did you?" The man laughed at my cries of pain.

"M-my, leg..." I whispered through a breath, my mind going fuzzy. 

"Let's just say you aren't my first." He almost laughed. "You aren't anyone special, I'm a professional."

I let my head fall against the floor of the van, finally defeated. Tears fell down my cheeks as I cried, my sobs filling the empty back of the car. 

"Keep it down, there's no one out here to hear you, lass." The man snapped, as I heard him turn up the radio slightly. 

The heavy metal music surrounded me as I bent my knees into my chest, not even able to hide my face in my hands and dream of better places. Whoever this man was, he knew what he was doing, and he clearly had plans for me. The very thought brought more tears to fall into my lap, and my anxiety took over. 

About ten minutes later, I lifted my head up as I felt the van come to a stop. I listened as the man got out of the vehicle, slamming his door shut after a few moments. The call of the ocean pierced the deafening silence as my heart beat through my ears. My breathing became heavy as I heard his steps get closer and closer. As the door flew open, I fell backwards in a scare, a pistol pointed in my direction. 

"P-please don't shoot me!" I screamed, turning my face from him. 

"More you say it, more I'll want to. Got it?" The man growled, and I nodded, my body shaking in fear. "Now give me the password."

Looking up slowly, I noticed the man holding my cell phone in one of his hands, the other still pointing the gun towards me. 

"I-If you want money, I don't h-have much—"

"Fuck's sake, shut up. Password." He repeated, cocking the gun quickly. 

My head nodded in defeat, I choked, "It's R-E-N-N-Y."

His fingers typed the letters in as quickly as I said them, and his brows furrowed as he unlocked my phone. A chuckled emitted from him, a heinous sound to my ears.

"Adorable." The man mocked me, and I felt a horrible feeling surface in my stomach. 

He turned the phone towards me, showing my homescreen. It was a picture of Ren and I on Halloween.

"Renny makes a fantastic Jack Sparrow, doesn't he? Lovely lookin' fella. Strong shoulders." He paused, "Ooh, I wouldn't mind cracking open his treasure chest, y'know? Can see why you fancied him." 

"He's dead, you monster." I cried, my shaking body making it hard to sit up straight. 

"It's rude to interrupt, Juliet." He said dismissively as he began rummaging through my device. "That's sad though, innit... Feel bad for sayin' I'd shag him now. Who am I kidding, no I don't. He looks like he'd be a strong lover. How long's he been dead again? Might still... ah, nevermind."

A chuckle emitted from him and my mouth dropped, a horrified expression on my face.

"And to make matters worse, without Mr. Howards in the picture, no one's gonna come looking for you." He feigned sympathy in his voice, "In fact, you have no family in New York City, do ya'?"

"You-you don't know me." I sobbed, my eyes full of tears, "When Damien finds out about this—"

"Oh, Cade knows already. Good thing Solomon's dead, that old prick finding out would've been bad news." A cocky grin crossed his face, one eyebrow raised as he looked at me, "And, I don't know you, do I? Juliet Morrinson, works at Solomon's as a pianist, moved to the city around six months ago by herself for ol' Renny boy. Well, boyfriend's dead three months in and she's in the big city by herself with no family, left to mourn the loss of her first love..." he trailed off as he continued looking through my phone. 

"Cliché movie bullshit..." I heard him mutter.

Gulping, I stared at him in disbelief. His knowledge frightened me, my heart tight and beating a hundred times a second. He continued to look through my phone as I watched him in horror. I noticed he was dressed clean, a black shirt and dark jeans with sleek boots; I couldn't be more confused. A look of satisfaction slowly appeared on his face, accompanied by a large grin. 

"Juliet Morrinson is no more." He hummed, placing my phone onto the ground and smashing it with his boot. I watched as he picked it up, his eyes meeting mine. "Say bye to Howards."

Without a warning he turned around, chucking my phone into the waves. My gasp got caught in my throat as the lump of tears grew larger.

"W-who are you?" I stammered, cowering from the man as he looked at me once again. "What do you want from me?"

"I want you to shut your bloody mouth and get out of the van." He barked, motioning for me to follow him with the gun. Taking notice of my hesitation he sighed, "Stop being difficult, yeah? Starting to get a migraine, been a stressful day. Kidnapping brats like you is a bloody task, I'll tell you that for nothing."

For the first time, I really looked into his eyes; they were dark and menacing, full of malevolence. His stare alone sent a cold shiver racing down my spine.

"Wish I brought some ibuprofen for my bloody head. Just get out of the van, yeah?" He asked, watching me closely. 

As I stayed frozen in place, the man clearly began getting frustrated; his jaw tensing as he took a step into the van. My first instinct was to kick him, or at least try to get away; but fear made me cower away from him, sliding back farther into the van. He grabbed me by my ankle, dragging me towards him quickly, causing my head to hit the floor with a thump. I let out a small cry of pain, and he groaned. 

"Give it up, slag." The man growled, grabbing me by my arm as he began to pull me to my feet. "Just get in the sodding boat."

Panic fell over me as he dragged me outside the van roughly, my eyes meeting the dock. A strong hand on my shoulder threw me forward several paces. I tripped over myself, unable to walk from the pounding pain in my calf. A sharp cry escaped my lips as I hit the pavement, knocking some wind out of me.

"Come on, lass, this is getting pathetic now." He said as he pulled me to my feet by the back of my collar.

As he shoved me forward again I desperately scanned the coast, spotting a building some ways off from us. Seeing cars parked outside filled me with a tiny glimmer of hope.

"Help! Someone, please!" I screamed into the night, the crash of the waves drowning out my pleas. 

The man's grip on my arm tightened, and he placed the barrel of the gun to my head. 

"Not another word!" He barked through gritted teeth. "Do you want to end up like your man?"

Against my better judgement, I ignored him, "Help me! Help!"

A light came on outside the building, and I tried to pry myself free from his grasp. The man held onto me tight, and let out a frustrated groan. To my surprise, he removed the gun from my head, and I glanced at him in confusion. 

He sighed, "Fuck's sake."

With that, he drew back the pistol and slammed the end of it into my face, knocking me out cold.


	2. Chapter 2

My mind slipped back into consciousness slowly. 

A wave of sickness fell over me as I barely opened my eyes, my head throbbing. I brought my hand slowly to my face, wincing as I felt a large gash on the top left of my forehead. I examined my fingers, small fragments of dried blood flaking off of them. 

Sighing deeply; I sat up slowly, my head pounding from the movement. My eyes wandered the room as I desperately tried to put the pieces together of what had happened to me, or where I was; but any sort of thinking only seemed to make my splitting headache worse.

Suddenly I remembered the man, his face, his eyes; and my breathing stopped. 

I examined the room I was in carefully. It was eerie and left me perturbed, unsettled. There weren't many things in it—a dresser, a lamp, the bed, and a large painting that hung on the wall. I looked around in bewilderment, without the lamp the room would be completely somber; there was no light leaking from any other areas of the room. 

Slowly I got up from the bed, my muscles were incredibly achy and weak; they hurt badly, as if I had ran a marathon the day before. What did he do to me? I thought to myself, pushing my legs over the side of the bed.

My bare feet hit the cold floor and I jumped at the chilling sensation, wincing as pain shot through my left leg. I took a deep breath and relaxed before standing up on my opposite leg. Weaker than I realized, my body began to shake before I fell, catching myself on the dresser. The small lamp that sat on top the dresser slowly swayed before it fell off and slammed onto the floor below. It shattered on impact, and I quickly covered my mouth. Silently sitting there, I was half expecting someone to come barging into the room to investigate the noise; but to my surprise, the hallway behind the door seemed to be awfully quiet. I let out a small sigh as my head pounded harder than before, but I refused to give up.

Despite the pain I was feeling throughout, I managed to get back on my feet. I let myself breathe deeply through my nose for a moment, taking in the unfamiliar smell of the room. My bottom lip trembled as I began to cry softly, a feeling of homesickness falling over me. Never once did I think I'd miss my shithole of an apartment, not until now. 

My eyes wandered the space again, and I noticed a bit of light coming from the back of the room. Limping over to it curiously, I tried to get a better look at what I saw. On the wall was a window hidden behind a curtain, a small ray of sunlight shining through the glass. Tilting my head, I reached it with a deep breath. As I peered through the glass, a gasp escaped me as I saw what was outside.

There was nothing visible from beyond the window apart from a vast view of the ocean. 

My breathing halted in my throat as I began to panic. Turning my attention to the edge of the window, I looked for some sort of latch to open it. When I finally located it, I felt tears brim the edges of my eyes as I noticed it was broken off, and I began to pry at the window desperately. Taking a deep breath, I swung my fist at the window, hitting it roughly. Wincing as I drew my hand away, I shook away the pain that reverberated through my arm, continuing to pound on the glass. My punching got louder as I began to use more force, determination flowing through me. 

The sound of footsteps echoed from beyond the door and an unlocking sound rang from behind me. As the sound of the door flying open echoed through the room, I quickly turned to see the man in the doorway. 

"What the bloody hell was that?" I heard the man bellow, his raspy voice filling the room. 

Unable to hold back my tears as I looked at him, I shook my head in disbelief. Hysteria fell over me as I glanced at where the lamp had fallen, and ran to it. Without hesitation, I quickly grabbed a piece of the bulb, and held it to my wrist. My eyes met my captor's, his dark expression twisted with a glare. 

"D-don't come any closer." I choked out, motioning to my wrist. "I'll do it."

"Of course I'd nab the barmy bird." The man groaned, mostly to himself before his attention turned back to me, "No, you won't." 

My hand gripped the glass shard roughly, and I winced as I pressed it against my skin a bit harder. My eyes stayed on the man, and he shook his head. He closed his eyes for a moment before bringing his fingers to pinch the bridge of his nose with a loud sigh. Before I could do anything—he turned back to the door, shut it, and locked it promptly before making his way over to me. 

A cry emitted from me as he went for my hand, squeezing the glass from my grip. After tossing the shard to the ground, he grabbed my arm and forced me towards the bed. 

"No! Let go!" I screamed out as I kicked and punched at him wildly.

"Pipe down, slag, would ya'?" He grumbled as we reached the bed, and he shoved me down on it with an aggressive push. 

Quickly moving to the opposite edge of the bed, I hit my back on the wall with a thud. He observed me and shook his head with a large smirk plastered across his face.

"W-where am I?" I questioned as I held my head in pain. 

His menacing smile slowly faded as he looked at me, and a strange feeling surfaced in my stomach. He moved, walking over to where I had dropped the lamp, and crouched down. Picking up the shards of glass carefully, his back muscles tensed through his shirt. 

Taking the opportunity, I looked down at my leg. My left calf was purple, and it ached with the slightest touch. Holding back a wince as I ran my hand over the mark, tears began to fall down my face. 

"I'll break it if you pull another one of your stunts." The man's voice echoed from across the room. "You break my things, I break your's kinda thing."

My gaze returned to where he was crouched, his back still facing me. With a deep breath, he stood up slowly and adjusted his posture. His body turned to me, but his eyes were on the glass he held in his hands. He brought his thumb to stroke over the pieces in his palm, a dark expression on his face. 

"What do you want from me?" I asked through a whimper. 

The man's eyes met mine as he pocketed the shards slowly. His jaw tensed, the look of grimace on his face forming a scowl. 

"You're gonna have a bad time here if you keep that up, Juliet." He warned with a growl.

My captor calling me by my name only made me more anxious, and I felt my body begin to shake. 

"How do you know who I am?" I questioned him, my voice shaky. 

"You just love your bloody questions, don't you? Think this is some kind of interview?" He tsked, shaking his head. "You don't get to ask questions yet. Be a good girl for me, and then maybe I'll indulge your curiosity."

Those words coming from his mouth sent bile up my throat, desperate to escape. I resisted, my anxiety holding me with an iron grip. His expression suddenly changed, back to one more playful, the corners of his mouth slowly forming a grin. He was enjoying this.

"I'm surprised you haven't recognized me already." He paused, raising an eyebrow. "You'd think the green skin and the red eye'd give it away. Murdoc Niccals, you know? A true deity... Philanthropist even, of my own kind. And you know, the leader and mastermind behind Gorillaz. You're a big fan of me actually, I noticed songs from both my albums were on your phone." 

Gorillaz.

Memories of Ren came flooding over me and I closed my eyes. The memory went sour as fear surfaced in my mind, my arms tensing. I suppressed a sob as he continued. 

"I'm flattered, really." Murdoc grinned; the way he talked sounded so cynical, like a sociopath. "Honestly, I thought 'Demon Days' was utter shite, too much influence from our lead guitarist at the time, Noodle—lovely little lass, might I add—who's sadly left us. Probably for the better." He finished, quickly.

Murdoc took a moment before continuing, "The only redeeming part of that rubbish was the harmonious bass riffs from yours truly. Did well though, on paper. Hard to complain, but I find a way. Blew through the earnings faster than I would have liked, it took a clever scheme to muster up the funds to build this place—only someone as brilliant as me could come up with a plan like that." 

A few moments of silence passed between us. Murdoc tapped his foot against the ground a few times before looking back at me.

"Are you always so boring in a conversation? Bloody shoulders hurt from carrying this little chat of ours."

"What am I supposed to say?" I questioned, shaking my head once again, "You've only been talking about yourself. Besides, I'm not even a fan, Ren wa—"

"Fucking hell, here we go again with Renny boy! You just love talking about him, don't ya'? I take it back, I prefer it when you're quiet." He took a few steps in my direction with a grin. "It's alright to admit when you're wrong, love. But don't let me get ahead of myself, we've got a lot more important business to discuss—much more important than you admitting you fancy me and my artistic endeavors, along with their successes."

My hands formed fists as I turned from him in disgust.

"You look like you're itchin' to say something. If it's more slander, you can save it, slag." Murdoc snapped, breaking me from my thoughts. 

My gaze slowly met his, confusion falling over me as I shook my head. "Are you... drunk?" 

"Took you this long to finally say something, and it's another bloody question? You know how I feel about those. Ignoring the thing you said before about not being a fan of course, you didn't mean that, did you?" As I opened my mouth to defend my previous statement, he continued, "You'd know if I was pissed, love. I'd be a lot more talkative after a bottle of Harrogate Rum—hell, maybe a bit randy with a pretty bird like you 'round. If Ren were here, might even ask him to join us—sorry. Anyways..."

Forcing my gaze away from him, I repressed a gag. His eyes stayed on me for a moment before he pulled out one of the shards from his pocket to look at. My breathing stopped momentarily as he stared at the glass, leaving me with an uneasy feeling. 

"You know what? It's not important. Probably the least important thing right now. You're bloody delirious—must be if you don't think you like me—so we'll talk about it tomorrow."

The only response I could find was giving him a confused look.

"This," He glanced at me, holding up the piece of glass, "This has already gotten you in a lot of trouble. We'll try again tomorrow." 

Suddenly he turned around and made his way to the door. He went to grab the handle to leave, and I stopped him as an idea struck me; whether or not it was a smart one, I didn't have time to decide.

"W-wait!" I called to him and he looked back at me with a confused stare. Choking on my words I added, "I have to go to the bathroom..."

He scoffed and rolled his eyes slightly, "Shit in the corner for all I care, princess."

"No!" I yelled at him. He shot me a harsh glare and I cleared my throat, "I mean a real bathroom... Please..."

His dark eyes looking me up and down did absolutely nothing to help my anxiety. The sight of him terrified me, and he knew it very well. My hands trembled uncontrollably as I pushed them close to my chest in an attempt to hide my fear. Finally his body moved, and he spoke.

"Fine," he muttered, "You want a bathroom, I'll show you to a bloody bathroom."

His hand locked around my wrist tightly as he pulled me off the bed in one fluid motion, pain shooting down my arm. I winced and yelped as I landed on my bad leg, getting no response from my captor as he continued. Limping forward to keep at his pace, we moved down a long corridor, passing a few doors before settling on one. Murdoc threw me in by the wrist, and to my horror, entered with me, closing and locking the door behind him.

"I—uh..." I stumbled over my words, embarrassment plastered across my face.

"What, all of a sudden you're shy?" He shook his head, no emotion on his face. "Hurry up."

Anxiety flowed through my heart once more. The plan, whatever it was, was not going accordingly. My eyes quickly scanned the bathroom, falling on the mirror for a brief moment before his raspy voice caught my attention again. 

"I haven't got all day." Murdoc snapped from behind me and I ran my hands through my hair. 

"I can't go with you standing there." I played along, eyeing the mirror. 

Looking at myself, I cringed. My blonde hair was a mess on top of my head, adorned by the prominent bruise surrounding my right eye, darkening the blue-green iris. 

Without a word, Murdoc scoffed, turning around dramatically. I felt my heart race in my chest as I saw my options playing in my mind. In an attempt to seize the opportunity, I picked up the bar of soap that laid on the counter near the sink. With all my energy, I slammed it into the mirror on the wall, a few shards falling onto the counter. 

My fingers started to tremble as I grabbed a piece of the glass, before lunging at Murdoc. Before I could hit him, his hand grabbed my arm, gripping my wrist tightly. My eyes met his. Anger was not a word to describe what I saw in them. 

"Break one more thing, whore!" Murdoc growled, squeezing the shard free from my grasp. 

Panic filled me as I heard it drop to the floor, and without a warning, the back of my captor's hand made contact with my face in a quick motion. I screamed as something sharp cut me simultaneously, my body falling to the floor. As I pressed myself up off the tile, my heart stopped as I saw blood drip onto the floor slowly. I closed my eyes, taking in the pain I was feeling in my face as tears swelled in them. 

I heard Murdoc kick some of the shards to the side before crouching down on one knee to where I laid. I could feel his fingers snake through my hair before he pulled me to face him. 

"Let go of me!" I kicked at him as tears ran down my face. 

"Wanna test me, do you? What did I say about breaking my fucking things?" He bellowed as I received another hit to the same spot. 

"S-stop... please!" I begged, his grip on my hair tightening.

"Really? 'Oh, s-s-stop, p-p-please'." He laughed coldly as he mocked me, "Keep on begging, princess, doesn't work on me. A-a-ah, why does everyone say that, anyways? Before they get punished? Break not one, but two of my bloody things, what'd you think was gonna happen, you—you git?"

As he spoke, he started twitching slightly as his speech became less coherent and much faster. He paused for a moment before looking at me, with sympathetic eyes.

"O-oh, you know, I think I've had a change of heart, love. Yeah... as a matter of fact, I'll call up a boat to send you home. May as well give you the bloody keys to my submarine—or, or I can pack you up in my little suitcase and ship you off in the post. Yeah, yeah—maybe I'll just chuck you off the sodding dock in it, see if you can catch a ride before you drown!" The sarcasm faded from his voice as he growled, "Fuck off."

Tears fell down my face as I felt him let go of me; I choked out, "Fuck you..."

There was a moment of silence between us as his attention turned to the toilet. When he returned his gaze to me, a nauseous feeling surfaced inside my stomach.

"Didn't you say you had to use the loo?" He asked with a sly grin, "Let's do that, yeah?"

My breath caught in my throat, my heart beating with anxiety. I couldn't bring myself to find a response.

"Ah, it's not smart to hold it in, y'know. Let me help."

The sound of my cries filled the bathroom as I heard him stand up, my head falling to the floor. Suddenly hands pulled me up by my arms, and I was dragged to the toilet promptly after. Murdoc lifted the seat and seat cover up and turned me so I was looking into the bowl. I shook my head, trying to take a glance at him but he grabbed me by my hair once again, holding me where I was. 

"Don't lose your bowels now." He laughed maniacally.

Suddenly, he forced my head into the water. My screams were muffled as I tried to fight back, pushing myself away with both my hands, but his grip was strong. I lost air as I was held there, my mind going fuzzy as the oxygen depleted from my lungs. My thrashing slowed as I tried to lower my heart rate, and before I knew it, he pulled my head back up. 

"Fight me, you're fighting for air." His grip tightened around the back of my head and neck, "I own you now. Got that?"

All I could do was nod in response, my head spinning as I breathed in deeply. My eyelids grew heavy as I felt his grip loosen on my hair. I couldn't stop myself from coughing, and the pain in my cheek subsided as I felt my body relax into his. I looked towards the ground once more, and the sight of my own blood turned my stomach upside down, nauseating me. 

Before I knew it, my eyes rolled to the back of my skull, and I was out cold once again.


	3. Chapter 3

"Juliet."

Hearing his voice made me jump, and I looked up from my desk to see Ren in the doorframe. I couldn't help but gawk at him, his dark brown locks and blue eyes bringing comfort washing over me. Everything about him was perfect. Between his smile, kind eyes, and love for me; he couldn't make me happier. 

"Renny?" I called to him, tilting my head. "What are you doing here?"

Without an answer he held up a bag with a raised eyebrow, a small smile forming on his face. I could recognize the logo of my favorite sandwich shop anywhere, and I returned his gesture with a grin. 

"You didn't have to." I gushed, closing my laptop quickly. 

He made his way over to me, placing the bag on my desk as he planted a kiss on my forehead sweetly. My eyes stayed on him as he took a seat across from me, and I sighed. I watched as he started twiddling his thumbs together, his gaze on the floor. Uneasiness fell over me as silence filled the room. 

"How did it go?" I asked in a hushed voice, biting my lip. 

His eyes stayed on the floor, "Maybe we should talk tonight about it."

"No." My voice cracked, "Just tell me."

He finally looked up at me, tears swelling in his eyes. I nearly choked as I held back my own tears, trying desperately to keep my composure. I knew what he was going to say, and this only made remembering it worse. 

"I don't have a lot of time."

The words echoed through the office as pillows of smoke seemed to fill the room. His voice rang in my head, and I reached out my hand to him. 

"No, you're going to be fine." I lied, trying my best to calm myself down. 

He shook his head as I grabbed his hand. 

"I'm going to die, Jules."

The sound of his voice seemed to amplify, and I let go of him to cover my ears. I closed my eyes tightly, tears streaming down my face as the room seemed to shrink slowly. Anxiety ran through me, and I felt my heart race increase dramatically. 

"Soon enough, you will too." 

I opened my eyes and he was gone, the office back to normal. I looked around, standing up from my desk in a panic. 

"Ren?" I called to him, but there was no answer. 

I ran to the door, opening it and stepping into the hall. Looking to my left and to my right, there was no one there. My legs felt weak and I fell to the floor sobbing, my cries echoing through the hall. 

***

"Ren!"

My eyes shot open as I screamed his name, sitting up quickly. Tears fell down my face, and my body began to shake as I took deep breaths in an attempt to calm myself down. Remembering the day Ren told me he was going to die seemed to haunt me, giving me nightmares since his passing. Just thinking of his face made me cry even more, a sob escaping me as I held my head in my hands. All I could see was him, his kind smile, and—

"Hm, you really think you're someone special don't you?"

Letting out a small surprised yelp, my attention turned to my captor. He was leaning against the door, watching me from across the room. He brought his lit cigarette to his lips, inhaling deeply as he stood there. 

"What?" I choked, wiping my tears away in embarrassment. 

Was he... watching me sleep? Fear erupted inside of me, remembering what had happened before I passed out. He tried to drown me, to kill me. My breathing stopped for a moment as I remembered his strength, pushing my head into the water with ease. 

Murdoc raised an eyebrow at me as he exhaled a large cloud of smoke, he scoffed, "Waking up in a cold sweat after having a nightmare, screaming your boyfriend's name? Coupled with your backstory, you're a real life Mary Sue, aren't you?"

I couldn't bring myself to respond, despair filling my mind. Suddenly a pain shot through my head, and when I went to touch it, I noticed that my face was clean of any dried flakes of blood. There was a bandage taped to my cheek, and another on my forehead. My eyes met his, sending a cold shiver racing down my spine. 

"Just making sure you don't die on me, uh—" taking notice to my look of confusion, he added, "—if you're wondering why I'm here."

"Am I supposed to say thank you for not killing me?" I questioned with a small scoff, which clearly tested his patience.

"Break one more thing or try to hit me and you'll wish I did." He warned, bringing the cigarette to his mouth once again. "You're turning out to be more trouble than I thought. See, you've wasted not only my time, but your own as well. I suggest for your own sake, shape up, because lasses like you are a dime a dozen. Could just as easily take the boat over and nab another one of you tomorrow. Not to worry, lovely, I still have faith you'll turn around. Right?"

My eyes moved to the floor as I took a deep breath. The smell of tobacco filled my nose, and I could feel the hairs on my arms as they raised slowly. Memories of my father crossed my mind, and it sent a pulse of anxiety through me. 

"Still just as boring as you were yesterday." Murdoc growled, snapping me out of my haze, his eyes dark. "Did daddy not teach you to look at a lad when he's talking to you? Figured you were the type of bird to have daddy issues. No excuse to have no manners though, now is it? My ol' man was a right dickhead, but I turned out just fine. Looks like I'll have to play the father figure again—not that I'm complaining... Anyways, ready to act like an adult?"

"God, you're disgusting." I said without a second thought, my eyes widening as I realized who I was talking to. 

Murdoc's gaze turned cold, his jaw tensing. Frozen where I was, the fear and anticipation of his response irked me. My eyes followed him as he pushed himself off the door and ambled towards me. His tongue rolled over his bottom lip as his free hand grabbed my wrist roughly. 

"Again, you only open your mouth to slander me. So here's lesson one," he started, taking another drag off his cigarette before continuing. The smoke filled the air between us, and he chuckled deeply. "Don't talk back."

He pulled my wrist forward, turning it towards him for a better look. Before I could say anything he dug the lit end of his cigarette into my delicate skin, immediately shooting pain through my arm. I pulled away, screaming vulgarities at the top of my lungs as my body began to shake. Bringing my hand to cover the burn, I squeezed it gently in an attempt to ease some of the pain. 

"What do you say?" Murdoc mocked, a smirk forming on the edge of his mouth. 

"I-I'm sorry." I stuttered, my voice was weak. 

This earned me a gaze of approval from my captor, a satisfied look on his face. My eyes met the floor as I held back a sob. I wanted to speak out, but I held my tongue. I had to play his game for now. 

"Good, Pavlov. We figured out how to make you behave." He spoke condescendingly, crouching down to face me. "It's not a hard dynamic to understand. You do as I say, nothing more, nothing less."

I simply nodded, but this earned a look of disapproval from the green skinned man. My voice cracked, "Yes, sir."

Murdoc tilted his head, his grin widening, "Didn't even have to hit you this time. Wasn't so hard, was it?" 

A light shone near his chest and my eyes moved to the necklace that hung around his neck. I stared at the gold inverted cross, the sight of it brought an uneasy feeling to wash over me. His eyes moved down to where my gaze ended, and he gripped the cross in his hand. Flashing it in my direction, he looked up at me, our eyes meeting. 

"Do you like it?" He asked, his brows furrowing. "Made a deal with Beelzebub, the king of the underworld himself. He gifted me my lovely bass guitar, El Diablo. A small gift for the eternal contract—"

"I really don't want to hear another story." I cut him off before he continued, backing away slightly.

"That's rude, innit? I wasn't done. Clearly your parents didn't teach you any manners." Murdoc replied casually before standing and turning around, throwing his hands up dramatically, "But if 'Virgin Mary' doesn't want a story, I guess we won't have one. You're incredibly undeserving of a Murdoc Niccals story anyway. I should charge for every minute you waste of my time. I'd be able to buy another bloody island." 

My eyes widened as the nickname sent a pulse of anxiety through me. Surely he didn't know about that, he couldn't. Before I could dwell on it anymore, Murdoc cleared his throat.

"Since her Highness doesn't want to hear about me anymore, we'll talk about her." He grumbled, fixing his shirt. "By now you're likely wondering why you're here. Well, not likely, I know you want to know what you're doing here." He paused for a moment, "I guess I should say congratulations."

"What?" I stammered, tilting my head slightly. 

"You're officially Gorillaz's new maid." Murdoc praised, "You know; housekeeper, servant, au pair, whatever you want to call it."

"I'd call it slavery." I snapped a bit, and he scoffed. 

"Ah, I don't like that word." He started speaking with his hands, gesturing randomly. "I think...indentured servitude fits it better. An internship—unpaid of course."

I felt one of my eyebrows instinctively raise as I tried to wrap my head around his mental gymnastics.

"...Slavery." I repeated.

"Well, if you want to be politically incorrect, that's your prerogative, Juliet." He rolled his eyes and scoffed, "You don't need to remind me about the fact you've been kidnapped every time you open your bloody mouth, 'Oh, I'm Juliet, I got kidnapped by the mean British man. Too bad my dead boyfriend and my bland personality can't save me—also can't hold up my end of a conversation if it were to kill me.' That's all I hear every time you deign to speak. You're the saddest sod I've ever had the displeasure of kidnapping, you know that? Slavery? Get over yourself, lass. Not like I'm whipping you or anything."

My jaw dropped slightly as I held out my wrist, pointing to the burn from his last cigarette. Then to my face which was covered in bandages, still bloodied. Repressing the frustration that was slowly burning up inside me, I looked at him with a glare of mixed curiosity and anger.

"That's different, you deserved that." He said coldly. "I'll be back soon. Try not to throw another tantrum, you brat."

Holding my tongue, I watched as he made his way to the door. He opened it, shooting me one last glance before walking out into the hallway. When he shut the door I could hear him lock it quickly after, and I closed my eyes. 

My back hit the mattress with a thump, and I took a deep breath through my nose. My body ached as pain flowed from so many different sources I lost count. Hopelessness washed over me as I felt a familiar lump growing in my throat, tears forming at the edge of my eyes. 

To think this man actually thought I did anything to deserve being drugged, hit, even drowned, was beyond me. One wrong word and I could be killed for all he cares. This only made me feel more sick to my stomach, remembering my nightmare. Ren said it himself, I was going to die here. I could feel a tear roll down the side of my face as I closed my eyes, my breathing suddenly out of rhythm. 

In the meantime, all I could do was listen. If I do my job and comply I'll have a better chance of getting out. I needed to, for my own sake. If I kept playing into his dynamic I could win trust, which currently is the only ticket out of here. 

Not more than ten minutes later, I heard my door unlock once again. 

I sat up this time, pushing my feet off the bed as Murdoc walked into the room. He was holding a small bowl in one hand, with a spoon in the other. My curiosity got the best of me as I raised an eyebrow at him, watching as he made his way to me slowly, as if not to spill whatever was in the bowl. 

When he reached where I was, he handed me the bowl, which I hesitated to take at first. I eyed it suspiciously, and noticing this, Murdoc spoke up. 

"I-I thought you might be hungry." He admitted, grabbing my hand, forcing me to take it from him. "Don't need you losing more weight, especially if you plan on smashing more of my shit."

Wincing from the heat, I held the bowl with both my hands carefully. I could see clearly now it was cheap microwaved chicken soup, and with a growl from my stomach, I decided against complaining about the lack of vegetarian options.

My eyes met his, and I nodded slowly in defeat, "Thank you."

Murdoc handed me the spoon and I took it with a small, forced smile as I inhaled deeply. He brought his hand to push a small piece of hair out of my face, and I winced slightly, an instant knot forming in my stomach. Taking notice to this, he backed off, running his hand through his dark brown locks awkwardly. Without a word he sighed, giving me a nod before turning and heading for the door. I watched him leave, and heard a locking sound ring through the room once again. 

Something inside me almost became intrigued by my captor, a small glimmer of curiosity of who this man was. It was safe to assume at this point I could play it cool, giving into his power trips to keep myself out of trouble, but what was his motive? 

What did he want from me?


	4. Chapter 4

I didn't sleep much that night. 

My eyes were heavy as a small light hit my face through the window, the sun coming up slowly. Getting in a comfortable position seemed nearly impossible all night, my tossing and turning earning me four hours of sleep. 

With hesitation, I peered over to the wall, the clock reading 7:40 AM. A groan emitted from me as I moved from my side onto my stomach, pulling the covers over my shoulder, just under my face. There was nothing more that I wanted at that moment then to try and sleep for another few hours. My night had been full of nightmares and anxiety induced panic attacks, neither of which I was fond of. 

As if Satan himself had heard my plea for sleep, I heard the door to my room unlock.

"Rise and shine, princess." 

The morning couldn't get any worse. 

I pulled the covers over my head, holding back frustrated tears as I heard Murdoc enter the room. The hardwood under his boots creaked with every step, until he had made it over to my bed. Silence filled the room, and I peeked my head out slowly, our eyes meeting. He was standing near the end of the bed, his arms crossed tightly over his chest as he watched me. His eyes moved to the bedside table where I had left last night's dinner, untouched. 

"You didn't eat." Murdoc stated, raising an eyebrow as he glanced back to me.

"I wasn't hungry." I lied, my voice muffled from the sheet. 

This earned me an unconvinced stare from the bassist, his jaw tensing. 

He rolled his eyes, "You'll give that up before the week's over. Get up. You have a lot of work to do."

Pulling the sheet off my face, I sighed deeply. Murdoc immediately shot me a glare, his arms falling to his sides as his hands formed fists. Not wanting to anger him further, I sat up quickly. My head pounded at the sudden movement, and I brought my hand to my head with a small wince. 

Murdoc's eyes never left me as I sat on the edge of my bed. His dark eyes burned into my head as I felt him watching me. I looked down at my clothes I had been wearing for several days now, unwashed and stained with sweat and blood. Trying to play to his sense of sympathy was a pointless endeavor, but it was worth trying.

"Can I at least change first?" I asked him, and he looked around the room. 

"I didn't realize you were goin' on vacation. Didn't bring spare clothes, did ya?" He said with a tinge of sarcasm.

"Please? I need a shower too." I pleaded.

Murdoc took a deep breath as he looked me up and down, finally rolling his eyes and leaving the room. He shut the door behind himself, and I heard his loud footsteps travel down the hall outside. Before I had time to consider acting, I heard him marching back.

He burst through the door as he threw an object towards me, startling me as it wrapped around my head. It stunk of old beer and cigarettes.

"Here then, princess." He feigned sympathy.

I held out the shirt to examine it, a plain white tee, stained in cigarette burns and light orange alcohol spills. The stench and sight was enough to make me sick.

"You're kidding?" I asked in disbelief.

"Wear your shit stained trousers then, I don't care. Like I said, you've got work to do." He snapped, urging me along.

Defeated, I groaned as I dropped the filthy shirt on the ground and finally stood up.

He gestured over to himself and made me walk in front of him as we went down the hall. I took the time to examine our surroundings, looking at the portraits hung up on the white walls. Eventually, we came to a large room with an L-shaped couch and television, two of the walls adorned with large glass windows. 

A sick feeling crept up my throat as I looked past the glass for a moment, noticing the ocean outside. In the distance, I saw the silhouette of a lighthouse, sinking my heart to the bottom of my body.

Before I could get a better look, we moved past the room and made our way into the large kitchen through the opposite door. It was a large space. There was a huge island on the left side of the room, and a dining room table on the right. A sigh escaped me as I realized how messy it was, dishes covering the countertops and sink. 

Glancing around the kitchen, I noticed a blue haired boy sitting at the far end of the dining room table. He was eating toast with a blank expression, and looked up at us as we walked in. He was a good looking guy, and I could tell he was very tall. As my eyes met his, I noticed they were completely black, sclera and all, causing me to hesitate before entering the room further. 

"I told you to be out of here by the time I got back." Murdoc's voice snapped me out of my haze, my attention turning to him. 

His back muscles tensed as he stared at the boy, his grimace forming a scowl. The boy scoffed, taking another bite of his food. 

"Sod off you ol' goth, I'm finishing the manky scran you made." He snapped, his voice muffled from the food still present in his mouth.

My jaw dropped a bit, surprised by the amount of sass in the boy's tone. Murdoc immediately walked over to him, and he cowered from the bassist slightly. I watched in a mixture of curiosity and dismay as Murdoc smacked the back of his head roughly before pulling him to his feet from under his arms. 

"Ow! Okay, I'm moving it!" The boy yelled, stumbling forward as Murdoc pushed him towards the door. 

"I don't want to see you in here again, twit." The green skinned man growled with a warning. 

My eyes followed the boy as he made his way towards me, heading for the door. Before he walked out, he stopped briefly where I was standing, his eyes meeting mine. I opened my mouth to say something, but quickly shut it as I glanced at Murdoc. 

"Stop bothering the lass, face-ache." Murdoc warned, "I don't want you distracting her."

Without a response, the blue haired boy looked back at Murdoc, shaking his head. He scoffed before pushing past me, out of the room. Once the boy's footsteps were no longer audible, I turned back to Murdoc, crossing my arms slowly. 

"Who's that?" I asked in a soft voice, curiosity getting the best of me. 

"A stupid twat, that's who." Murdoc grumbled, walking back towards me.

Unsatisfied with the answer I was given, I raised an eyebrow at him slowly. Ignoring this, he walked behind me, gripping me by my shoulders. He pushed me to face the kitchen, gesturing towards it. 

"First thing's first," Murdoc stated, a hint of malevolence in his tone. "I want you to clean this shit up."

My eyes wandered the kitchen, the amount of work it would take to clean it was tremendous. I couldn't help but shake my head slowly. 

"...Really?" I stammered, my voice quiet. 

Murdoc's hands left my shoulders as he walked over to the fridge, opening it quickly. He grabbed out a beer, turning to a bottle opener on the counter. 

"Yeah, really." He answered, opening the beer and letting the cap fall to the floor. "It's only going to get messier the longer you stand around."

I glanced at the cap on the floor, my jaw tensing. Without a word, I walked up to him and leaned down, picking up the cap slowly. His eyes never left me as I stood back up, and I watched as he took a swig of his drink. 

"Good girl." He praised slightly, pointing to the sink. "Supplies is under the sink, well, it should be. We never use it." 

Our eyes met briefly, and I shot him a glare before tossing the bottle cap into the garbage and making my way to the sink. I crouched down, opening the cabinet doors to find a couple types of cleaning detergents and garbage bags. 

"I'm going to be writing lyrics today while I keep an eye on you, so don't try anything." I heard Murdoc growl from behind me. 

Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath through my nose, trying to clear my mind. Before Murdoc could say anything else, I grabbed the bottle of dish soap and a pair of gloves from the cabinet and stood up. 

After putting on the gloves I decided to start on the dishes in the sink first, holding my breath as I noticed mold growing on the plates on the bottom of the stack. Repressing a gag, I turned on the water and started to rinse the dishes. Even when I lived with my father in Maine, I never had to clean up such a huge mess. The sheer magnitude of the job left me feeling anything but determined to finish.

Having Murdoc in the room only made me more anxious, the burden of satisfying his expectations becoming overbearing. With a small sigh, I tried to shake off any of the uneasy thoughts I was having as I quickened my pace.

As I finished cleaning the dishes in the sink, I turned to grab some of them off the island counter. My gaze met Murdoc's, and an icy chill rushed down my spine as I realized he was watching me from where he sat at the table. My eyes stayed on him as I picked up a small stack of plates. 

"Am I doing it right?" I asked with a bit of sass, my captor raising an eyebrow at me.

"No." He simply replied, looking back down at the notes in front of him. "You washed the last stack of plates with hand soap."

"No, I..." My voice trailed off as I turned to the sink, seeing a bottle of hand soap next to the dish soap, realizing he was right. "...didn't."

Closing my eyes with a deep breath, I could hear him scoff from behind me. Irritation burned in my gut, and I shot him a small glare. 

"How would I know the difference if neither of them have ever been used?" I snapped slightly as I placed the small stack of dishes into the sink. 

"Well, let's use our eyes, love." Murdoc mocked, glancing up at me slightly, "Bold assumption, I know, but let's just assume you've graduated primary and know how to read. Let's also assume at one point you've used hand soap—"

"Alright, asshole. I get it." I growled, turning back to the sink. 

Murdoc simply chuckled to himself, and I tried my best to block him out of my thoughts as I continued to work. 

***

There was tension radiating off me as I continued to scrub the last of the dishes, my arms growing tired with every plate. I had to have been cleaning for at least a couple of hours at this point, taking breaks between scrubbing dishes to clean up other messes around the kitchen. One of the things I saved for last was cleaning the three ashtrays that I found, all of them disgustingly dirty. 

Murdoc had been watching me the whole day, only getting up to get food or a drink once in awhile. Other than that he had been quiet, almost too quiet for my liking considering the way he held his tongue about the soap. Regardless, I was just relieved I was almost done cleaning. 

Taking a deep breath, I began to soak the ashtrays, the water in the sink turning a black color. I brought them out one by one to scrub and rinse, not bothering with sanitizing them like I did with the silverware and dishes. With one last sigh, I dried them and returned them to where they were originally, a smirk forming on my face. 

My eyes wandered the now spotless kitchen, and I removed the gloves I had on slowly. Relief fell over me as I placed them back under the sink before turning to where Murdoc sat at the table. 

"I finished." I simply stated, wiping my face with my hand. 

Murdoc's attention turned to me, and I watched as he looked around the kitchen in thought. 

"Really?" He scoffed, leaning back in his chair. 

Anger and frustration burned inside of me, his tone of voice telling me he was unsatisfied with the job I had done. 

"This kitchen is spotless," I retorted, throwing my hands up in defense, "What the fuck do you mean?"

His eyes met mine, his dark gaze instantly making me regret my choice of words. 

"Do you have a few minutes to spare, Juliet?" Murdoc chuckled to himself, standing up. "Of course you do. Let me show you."

The bassist walked over to where I was and I crossed my arms, biting my tongue as he began to look at everything closely. He pointed to the sink, scoffing. 

"This isn't drained," He started, his voice stern. 

My eyes stayed on him as I forced my hand into the dirty water, pulling out the plug in the sink with a small huff of air. As I rinsed my hand off, he continued to walk around the kitchen motioning to things. 

"The plates go in that cupboard, opposite to this one." Murdoc continued, "I saw you didn't clean the back of some of these plates, so you might as well rewash them all to be safe." He paused, running his fingers along the countertop. "This needs to be wiped down again, and that means the floor probably needs to be swept again as well."

"...Are you serious?" I questioned, holding back a scoff. 

"Did you think I was joking when I said you're the maid?" Murdoc growled, my jaw tensing at the intensity in his voice. "Thought you were gonna be our eye-candy secretary to help with the bookkeeping? Don't flatter yourself, lass, you're not nearly pretty enough for a job like that. Now get to work."

"No." I refused, shaking my head. "I've been doing this for hours—"

"I'm sorry?" He cut me off, taking a few steps in my direction. "You'll work for another few hours, or all bloody day if I say so. Don't get bossy with me, brat."

Trying my best to hold back tears as they swelled in my eyes, frustration burned through me. 

"You're being unfair," I pleaded, as I uncrossed my arms slowly. "I'll do anything else."

The tension in the room rose, and I could feel my fingertips begin to shake at my sides with anticipation. Murdoc stared at me with dark eyes, his expression unreadable. 

"We both know you didn't bring me here to be a fucking maid." I snapped, running one of my hands through my hair. "Stop playing this out and admit why I'm really here."

Murdoc's gaze turned sour, his posture straightening suddenly. He made his way over to me, clearly fuming. My heart race increased dramatically, his body inches from mine as he towered over me. Feeling like a coward as my body began to shake, my eyes moved to the opposite wall. 

"Trying to get in my knickers, love?" Murdoc asked, leaning down to my level. "While I'm sober, too? Yeah, right. I'm more than just a piece of meat, y'know..."

"Oh, please. Just save it." I scoffed, looking away from him. "Don't try and flip this on me and act like I'm wrong. You brought me here."

"I'm sorry, I forgot you were the damsel in distress. Or at least, that's what you think you are, right?" He mocked, too close for comfort. "You're the one who's offering to 'do anything' but clean. Thought you'd suck me off for a few dishes less? You'd like to have it that easy, wouldn't you?"

"I never—that's not what I meant."

"What did you mean, then?" Murdoc challenged with a deep chuckle, "You think that I'll let you slag off at your job if you bargain away your dignity and self respect? Nothing's more unattractive than a bird offering herself up for something in return, surprised you aren't trying to get me to pay for it. This is what you're used to, innit? No wonder you worked at Solomon's, all you had to do was shag Cade for a job playing piano all day—hell, probably shagged the ol' man before he went out too. Unfortunately for you, that's not how it works 'round here, I'm no Damien Cade. Besides, you're far too skinny for me."

"I-I didn't... What?" My voice faded off as embarrassment fell over me, my face turning a bright shade of red.

Murdoc started walking forward once again, and I backed away until my backside was pressed against the counter. He brought his hands on either side of me to rest on the granite, trapping me between him and the countertop.

"If I wanted you, I'd have you here and now." His stern voice got quieter as he leaned in close to my ear, "But that's not why you're here now, is it?"

From the way he spoke, and how his face was rid of a grin of any kind, I could tell he was serious. I didn't answer, closing my eyes for a moment with a small whimper as I gulped slowly. Our eyes met as he backed his face away from my ear, and a tear fell down my cheek slowly. He let off a dark chuckle as he brought his hand to my face gently, wiping the tear away with his thumb. 

"Aww, Juliet... If it makes you feel better, I'm truly flattered." He soothed in a comforting tone. "Clean that up while you're at it, yeah?"

Backing away from the countertop, freeing me from the ruse, he made his way to the fridge slowly. Taking a deep breath, I ran my hands through my hair, trying to calm my shuddering body. 

"C-clean what?" I questioned with a shaky voice. 

Out of the corner of my eye I saw him grab another beer, and I turned my face to him to watch as he popped the cap off and onto the floor once again. 

His eyes met mine as he took a swig, the tiniest hint of a grin on his face. Without a word, he walked out of the kitchen, leaving me alone for the first time. Closing my eyes, I breathed in deeply through my nose as I leaned against the counter. 

He once again had the upper hand.


	5. Chapter 5

The next few days felt even less auspicious than the last.

Murdoc found joy in making my life a living hell, asking me to do impossible jobs only to belittle me after I completed them. It seemed whenever we had a talk he'd end it by making me feel weak and stupid. I could tell he was only testing me, but the conversation we had in the kitchen still irked me. The thought of him taking advantage of me made me sick to my stomach.

Yet he had been quieter today, and seemed distracted by something. I didn't question it; it wasn't any of my business, and I didn't particularly care about what was bothering him. I only did as I was told and kept my mouth shut, and so far it worked, Murdoc mostly kept to himself while I did my job. 

Today was laundry day, so I had been cleaning the boys' clothes for the majority of the morning. It was a long process of washing, drying, and folding; and it got repetitive fast. Thankfully I was on the last load, and all that was left was to fold them. 

Taking a deep breath, I placed the last of the clean clothes into the basket by my feet. I stretched my arms a bit before leaning down to grab it with both my hands, picking it up with a huff. Gripping the basket tightly, I made my way out of the laundry room and down the hall, headed for the living room. I had found that the couch was a good place to fold the clothes, and it was probably the brightest room in the whole building. 

My eyes wandered my surroundings as I ambled down the hall. The off-white walls were mostly bare, a few portraits hung here and there. My eyes met the window at the end of the hall, and I slowed down as I noticed the blue haired boy standing outside; his back was facing me as he leaned on the railing. Curiosity got the best of me as I stopped to watch him for a moment, my head tilting slightly as I saw a cloud of smoke escape him and dissipate into the sky. 

My gaze left the window and I turned to walk into the living room, holding the basket a little closer. When I reached the couch, I sat the basket down. My eyes moved to the sliding glass door that led to the deck, which was slightly ajar, and I bit my lip. Glancing around the room to make sure Murdoc wasn't around, I took a deep breath. 

The silence of the room brought anxiety spiking through me as I quietly made my way over to the door. With much hesitation, I stepped outside onto the patio, my feet burning slightly on the hot concrete. I squinted as the sunlight hit my eyes, and as I looked at my surroundings, my gaze met the boy's. Working up some courage, I made my way over to him, shooting him a small smile.

"Hi." I greeted him meekly, and his eyes trailed up and down me for a moment. 

"Hey." He simply replied, shoving his hand in one of his pockets simultaneously. 

I watched as he pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter, opening it promptly after and pulling one out. He placed the cigarette in his mouth before motioning the pack to me. 

"Oh, no... I don't smoke." I declined his offer, shaking my head. 

The boy shrugged slightly, lighting his cigarette before placing both the items back in his pocket. I moved next to him, and leaned up against the railing, my eyes wandering the beach below. 

"I'm Juliet, by the way." I smiled again, looking at him. 

"I know who you are." The boy responded, taking a drag off his cigarette. 

My smile faded slowly as I turned my face from him, "Oh..."

An eerie quiet filled the air, the only thing that could be heard was the crash of the waves on the beach below. I took a deep breath, closing my eyes for a moment, trying to relax. 

"My name's Stuart," He introduced himself, breaking the silence, "but everyone just calls me 2D."

Curiosity struck me as I looked at him, a small gust of wind blowing his blue hair out of his face. His fingers played with the cigarette in his hand for a moment before he brought it to his lips once again. 

"Why are you here?" I asked in a quiet voice, 2D glancing at me momentarily. 

"For the music, obviously." He replied bluntly as smoke escaped his lips, "I'd rather be anywhere but this sodding piece of plastic. At least the view's nice."

I sighed, "Tell me about it."

He didn't respond, the awkward silence filling the air once more. I brought my chin to rest on my arms, taking in the beauty of the water below as we sat there. Homesickness struck me once again, and a knot formed in my stomach. 

"I want to go home." I murmured, barely audible. "I miss my shithole apartment. Before I came here I was six months into living on my own," I paused. "Well, I had a roommate—a boyfriend—for three months before he..."

2D's posture straightened as my voice trailed off, and his eyes met mine. His jaw tensed as his black sclera slowly turned to a white color. Trying to hide my amazement, I continued the conversation.

"After he passed away, I didn't know what to do." I continued, looking at him, "But then three months later, I'm here... and instead of me finding purpose again, I'm back to where I was before New York. Living with a crazy psychopath in a house that doesn't feel like home. I thought I learned from the past, but here I am living it again. God, my life sucks."

2D let off a light chuckle, taking another drag off his cigarette. 

"I mean, it's kind of funny." I laughed, shaking my head. "My mom died, my dad was an asshole, I move across the country to live with my boyfriend, he dies, and then I end up here. I keep telling myself my life couldn't get any worse, but here I am. I mean, I don't even know why I'm here. There's no one left to pay a ransom, I'm no one special, so what the fuck does that green-skinned asshole want with me, y'know?"

"Do you always tell your life story to strangers?" 2D asked with a laugh.

"Well, considering I haven't had the chance to speak since I got here, yeah." I replied.

"Yeah, he tends to..." His voice trailed off, "Control the conversation."

"Does that with you too, huh?" I rolled my eyes. "Sometimes I feel like he just brought me here so he has someone else to talk to—about himself, of course."

"That makes two of us." He remarked, turning back towards the water. "You know, it's funny, you're not really Murdoc's type." 

"What?" I asked with a tilt of my head. 

"He's got a more 'shag and don't pay for it' taste in women. Especially when they already have a man." 2D explained with a feeble sigh. 

"Maybe preying on the girl with a dead boyfriend is more his style now." 

"Oof." 2D winced through a cloud of smoke. "He's got a taste in men, that's for sure." He muttered.

"Dead ones, maybe." I let off a small chuckle before turning back to the water quietly. 

2D looked at me, his brows furrowed slightly. "Are you okay?"

A wave crashed on the beach below, and I turned my face from him without a reply. In fact, I didn't know how to respond. Clearly I wasn't okay, but it didn't matter. Not only was it hard to talk about Ren, but nothing we were talking about gave me a clear answer as to why I was brought here, and it left me frustrated. 

Approaching footsteps filled my chest with anxiety.

"Isn't this nice?"

My heart dropped out of my chest as I sat up, seeing Murdoc in my peripherals. A breath of air caught in my throat as he crossed his arms, taking a deep inhale. A more than fake grin snaked its way across his green face, sending another jolt of anxiety through me. 

"I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?" Murdoc snickered, and I could hear 2D scoff. 

"Give me a break," 2D retorted, turning back towards the water. "Don't get all green-eyed. I came out here to smoke a fag and your bird followed me. We weren't saying nothin' bad."

"Nothin' bad..." Murdoc repeated with a hint of malevolence. "Why do you sound like a schoolboy hiding a fib from his teacher? Don't lie to Uncle Murdy, I heard what you said."

"What'd we say then, Pedro?" 2D challenged him, raising his eyebrows.

As 2D spoke, Murdoc turned his attention to the waves flowing along the beach.

"Blimey, look at this view. Beautiful, innit? Perfect spot to have a quick snog." Murdoc said, ignoring 2D's question, "It's not very gentlemanly of me to point out, but it doesn't seem like Juliet here is interested, mate; so I'll take you up on it, yeah?"

"You're an idiot." 2D rolled his eyes. 

"Still so upset about Paula that you think you can do whatever you like, is it?" Murdoc asked in a harsh tone. "I did you a favor, she was below standard, enough to put you off your dinner, mate. Minge wasn't nearly as rubbish as her guitar playing though—and while we're on the subject, let me clear the air. She fancied me. I only shagged her to show you how pathetic she was. You should be thanking me." 

"Thanking you? It's the principle, Murdoc." 2D snapped, and I took a step back from them slowly. "Paula didn't fancy you, and from what I've heard, neither does your new bird. It's mad, innit, how women that aren't for sale don't actually like you. Not that you paid for this one, or any of them for that matter. Say, since you like to bring up the past so much, why don't we tell her about Mexico? Recon Juliet would like to know how you—"

Murdoc raised his hand quickly, cutting 2D off. Taking a deep breath through my nose, I glanced at Murdoc as he lowered his hand slowly. His eyebrow raised as his eyes darted from me to Stuart and back again. To my surprise he stayed quiet, watching me as I stood silently. His attention turned back to 2D as he lowered his hand, speaking to me sideways.

"Go start making lunch, slag." Murdoc growled to me, his eyes still on Stuart as he spoke. 

With a simple nod I quickly made my way to the door to the living room, entering the house with a sigh of relief. I glanced down at one of my hands which was trembling slightly, and took a deep breath, walking into the kitchen slowly. My anxiety was spiking, and I was having a hard time calming myself down. 

The quiet buzz of the refrigerator was the only noise that could be heard as I walked to it leisurely. In the moment I decided on making my life easier by making sandwiches, and opened the fridge with a huff. My eyes scanned the contents quickly, and I started grabbing out tomatoes and lettuce, among other things, and placed them on the island counter. I paused as I looked for a loaf of bread, searching through the fridge in frustration. 

Suddenly, I heard someone enter the kitchen, and I held my breath for a moment. My eyes stayed on the food in the fridge as the person came up behind me slowly, and I could feel my heart pound with anticipation. 

After a few moments, Murdoc's voice rang in my ears. "Well, what the hell are you looking for?" 

"You don't have any bread?" I asked innocently, glancing back at him for a moment. 

"Yeah, in the fucking bread box, Juliet." He snapped with a tone of disbelief, motioning to a box on the far end of the counter. "Americans..."

My eyes couldn't have rolled back any further as I ambled over to the box, opening it with a scoff. I grabbed a couple of slices before tying the bag shut and returning to where I had left the rest of the ingredients. I looked around the kitchen for a moment, scanning the room a bit dazed. Murdoc cleared his throat, and my eyes met his.

"Now what?" He barked, leaning against the island next to me. 

"I need a knife." I explained, crossing my arms. 

His tongue rolled over his bottom lip slowly before he sighed, motioning to a drawer near the sink. With short quick steps, I minced over to the drawer, opening it promptly after. There were a few different sized knives inside, and I looked at the graded one with a small exhale. Reaching for the knife I paused as my fingertips traced over the handle, an idea surfacing in my mind. As I picked it up I could feel the sturdiness of it, and my jaw tensed as I moved my fingers over the graded metal slowly. It was sharp, and certainly enough to hurt someone with. 

To not make a scene, I made my way back to where I left the vegetables, my breathing becoming steady and focused. I noticed Murdoc watching me, his eyes scanning my body as I grabbed one of the tomatoes slowly. His jaw was tense, and I noticed a small grimace form on his face as he observed what I was doing. 

He moved suddenly, sitting up from where he was leaning on the counter, and I gripped the knife harder as I took a step away from him. Our gazes met, and his grimace had now formed a scowl as his eyes darted down to my hand and back. 

"I'll grant you the luxury of thinking twice this time." Murdoc bellowed deeply.

After a few moments I looked down to see I had the knife pointed directly at him, and my breathing nearly stopped. He took a step towards me and my grip got tighter, my knuckles turning white. I could feel my jaw tense as I watched him, and my stare went cold.

"Don't make me do it." I warned, lifting the blade up higher with my threat. 

"At least you're not fucking breaking something this time." He mocked, putting his hands up slowly. "If you fancy your chances, better make sure you cut me deep."

I paused for a moment before lowering the knife. "You think I'm gonna cut you?"

"Well you sure as hell ain't gonna cut yourself, lass. We've been over that." He laughed, shaking his head.

Frustration began to surface inside of me as he continued to mock me, the small amount of courage I felt slowly dissipating. My thoughts became fuzzy as I thought of a way out of the situation, and Murdoc lowered his hands. Fear replaced my frustration as he began to walk towards me slowly, and tears swelled in my eyes. 

The knife lowered as I felt my arm get weak, and before I could think he had grabbed my hand roughly, prying it from my grip. In a panic, I tried to fight back, reaching for the knife once again. As I wrestled him to grab it, my palm came in contact with the blade, slicing my skin with a quick motion. I staggered backwards with a yelp, gripping my hand in pain as I felt blood burst through the skin. 

Squeezing my hand shut, I brought it close to my chest as tears fell down my face. Murdoc tossed the knife near the other side of the counter as he turned back towards me. I cowered from him as he quickly took a few steps closer to me, covering my face with my free arm defensively. 

To my surprise, Murdoc grabbed my arm, yanking my hand from where I gripped it near my stomach for a better view. Without a word he pulled me to the sink and turned on the water, allowing it to run freely over the cut. I winced as he walked over to one of the cupboards and grabbed out what looked to be a first aid kit, opening it and running through its contents quickly. He got out a roll of bandage and walked back over to me, grabbing my arm once again and wrapping it around my hand tenderly.

I looked up at him as he did this, his facial expression was emotionless and hard to read. With a wince, I drew my hand back in pain as he tightened the bandage, but his grip grew stronger so I was unable to move.

"Hold still." He ordered and I obeyed, trying to relax as he finished. 

When he was done his gaze met mine and I went cold, unable to move in any way. My eyes moved to the floor as another set of tears fell down my face, a small whimper emitting from me. 

"This was your fault, quit with the waterfalls." Murdoc calmly stated, letting go of my hand. "If ya' didn't try and grab it from me, I wouldn't have nicked ya', Jules. You're the one who held onto the bloody thing. You need to be more careful."

The nickname he used brought anger to flow through me, and I lifted my head so our eyes met.

"Don't call me that." I growled through gritted teeth.

"What, Jules? Why?" He scoffed with a small amused chuckle, "Is that what Renny used to call you?"

It took everything in me not to scream at him, resentment filling my mind. Without thinking about it, I drew back my good hand and brought it to slap across his face in a quick fluid motion, my brows furrowing. Murdoc didn't even stagger backwards as I did this, and immediately raised his hand to retaliate. Much to my surprise, he paused before hitting me as I cowered from him. Anxiety ate at my stomach as his stare went cold, his tongue rolling over his bottom lip.

"Go to your room." He ordered with a deep growl, his posture straightening. 

My eyes widened as I noticed his body tense as if he was suppressing his anger, and I gulped. My fingertips began to shake and I brought them to run over the bandage on my hand, another wince escaping my lips.

"Don't make me tell you a second time." Murdoc warned, raising his hand in a threatening way. 

Without a word I obeyed, making my way past him as I made my way out of the room. I quickened my pace as I walked down the hall, never once looking back out of fear. Not only did my hand throb with pain but my heart seemed to do the same. 

Murdoc must have known bringing up Ren was crossing the line, whatever the line was for him. I was relieved that I didn't get punished for slapping him, but it also left me feeling a mixture of uneasiness and confusion. Before today I thought I understood Murdoc, I thought I had figured him out, but now more than ever I felt lost. His emotions weren't just black and white. There was more depth to my captor than I originally thought, and while that was surprising, it also filled me with a small bit of hope.


	6. Chapter 6

A loud banging noise tore me from my sleep.

Sitting up quickly, my heart began pounding in fear as the crashes sounded every few moments. Standing to my feet, I listened for the noise again. The silence of my room was eerie, and it brought a feeling of angst to wash over me.

Suddenly it came again, a loud pounding of something against the wall, and I ran to the door. Opening it, I walked out into the hallway cautiously. My breathing quickened as the sound filled the corridor once again. I followed it and ran down the hallway in curiosity. Coming to a door at the end of the hall, I stopped as the noise was now much clearer, grunts and groans could be heard from inside. Hesitating before pushing open the slightly cracked door, my fingertips began to shake.

My eyes widened in terror as I saw the cause of the noise.

Murdoc was in the middle of the room wearing only jeans, his surroundings destroyed. Papers and broken furniture parts scattered the floor, and he crouched in the center, a crying mess.

"What the...?" I gasped.

As if startled by me entering the room, he gripped an empty bottle on the floor and stood suddenly, turning on his heel and throwing it at the wall. Panic fell over me as the glass shattered, the remainder of its contents dripping down the wall. He fell back down to his knees; his breathing was heavy as he choked back his sobs.

"I am not cleaning this up." I called to him, crossing my arms.

Murdoc ignored me, turning his face from me quickly. Confusion fell over me as I heard him softly sniffle, and an almost frustrating feeling of curiosity followed. Closing my eyes briefly, I took a deep breath through my nose. When I opened them, Murdoc had stood up, his back still turned to me, the lack of his sobs filling the room with tense silence. Our eyes met as he looked back at me, his face rid of any tears.

"Bloody hell, Juliet. Gave me a bit of a fright." He feigned surprise, "Sorry I'm not decent, I wasn't expecting company."

Unconvinced, I raised an eyebrow at him slowly. He took notice to this, his eyes meeting the floor with a small sigh.

"Everything... okay?" I forced with apprehension, motioning to the mess he made.

Murdoc's eyes darted around the room briefly, and he let out a small, forced chuckle.

"I'm bloody marvelous," He beamed, "Yeah, yeah. Sorry about the mess. Would you believe, a rat found his way in my room? Little bastard's somewhere around here still."

"A rat?" I questioned, "In the middle of the ocean?"

"How do you think the Black Plague started, eh? Rats are bloody everywhere." Murdoc explained, gesturing with his hands. "Yeah, little guy came in with the last shipment, I suppose."

"You brought me in on a submarine."

"No, no, you weren't the shipment, you twit. Groceries."

"I think they'd check for rodents on a grocery delivery—"

"Enough about the bloody rat already!"

The tension in the room grew as I felt myself freeze at his tone. Straightening my posture slowly, I kept my eyes on him, holding my ground. Crossing his arms, Murdoc grimaced at me, accompanied by an annoyed stare.

"What, Juliet?" He asked with a small groan.

We stared at each other for a few more moments, the silence bringing an air of awkwardness to rise. Taking one last look around at the broken glass and furniture, my gaze met his once again.

"What's really going on?" I asked, concern present in my voice.

Murdoc sighed with a shake of his head, his gaze moving to the floor in defeat. He was unusually quiet, and it almost hurt me to see him so beat. As he slowly uncrossed his arms, I noticed a quick tear fall from his face and to the floor. My heart felt like it dropped into my stomach as he let out a small cry, more tears following. 

Against my better judgment, I slowly walked over to him, my feet trying hard to resist the decision. As I made it to where he stood, I hesitated a bit before placing my hand on his arm gently. I could feel his arm tense at my touch, but as he closed his eyes, he slowly relaxed. From this distance, I could smell alcohol on him, and I took a deep breath. 

"Murdoc, tell me what's wrong." I whispered, trying not to grit my teeth.

His crying continued but softened a bit as he looked up at me. His eyes were full of unusual pain and distress. Feelings of guilt and pity rose in my stomach as I watched him, my legs instinctively inching closer to him. As I did this, he brought me into a hug. His chest landed on mine, his head resting on my shoulder as his arms wrapped around me tightly. I hesitated as I slowly brought my arms around him, fear now falling over me as I realized he wasn't sober.

My concern for him was frustrating. The urge to throw him off of me and run back to my room crossed my mind, but my hands resisted. Instead, I rubbed his sweat stained back.

"Without this band I'm nothing..." He started with a sniffle, and I ran his hair through my fingers nervously. "Russel is nowhere to be found, he's dropped off the face of the goddamn earth and it's my fault Noodle's gone, I sent those people after her. I bloody killed her. All I have left is 2D, and he doesn't even want to be here."

My heart sunk again as he spoke, confusion and fear falling over me. He lifted his head from my shoulder and looked into my eyes, his cheeks glimmered with tears. Murdoc brought his hand to my face, his fingertips grazed my cheek softly. Anxiety spiked hard within me as he touched me, and I tried my best not to grimace at him.

"You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, I-I mean that." He slurred a bit, "When I saw you for the first time, I don't know what came over me. You were the most gorgeous person I had ever seen, and I wanted you, badly. I needed you here, with me, and the only way to make that happen was to force you here. You would've shut me down if I had approached you at the restaurant chatting you up, you're smarter than that. The only bloody chance I had at winning you over was by bringing you here, to Plastic Beach. I thought maybe if you were here you'd see... I don't know." He paused with a deep sigh, "I feel so lost, Juliet."

My face turned a bright red color as I sat there, blinking at him in shock, my arms still wrapped around him. He brought his hand to my waist, pulling our bodies together, our lips barely touching. I pulled my head back slightly, putting distance between our lips by pressing our foreheads together.

"I need you." He whispered, the stench of alcohol sending a shudder down my spine.

"You're drunk." I murmured, placing my hand over his to push it away but he didn't budge.

He ignored my statement and leaned in, planting a soft kiss on my cheek. Shock gripped me as I laid trapped in his arms. As he continued, I felt myself getting sick from the smell of alcohol. My heart started pounding as I started dragging my feet against the ground, trying to push myself away. Finally my foot held ground and I pulled myself out of his grip, a horrified look on my face.

"Don't be so shy, love." Murdoc cooed, and I felt chills rush down my back, one of my hands balling into a fist. 

He walked away from me and I stayed where I was, still catching my breath in a state of disbelief. Stumbling over himself after stabilizing on a chair, he fell into his bed, letting out a loud groan as he rolled onto his back. Turning towards the door quietly, I attempted to escape. My heart sank and my eyes shut tight when I heard his voice again.

"Stay with me..." He begged as I felt his eyes pierce the back of my head. 

I hesitated as he caught me, and I stood frozen in place. Still, I said nothing as I felt my heart beating, threatening to break through its cage of bone.

"Please, Jules."

My jaw clenched tightly as I heard that name. Instinctively, I felt myself responding.

"You don't get to call—" I bit my tongue.

"What...?" He asked in a daze.

I took a deep breath through my nose and finally turned around, accepting my defeat. Holding my breath to avoid the stench of alcohol, I laid down with a very generous distance between us. He wasted no time at all crossing the line I made, wrapping his arm around my stomach and pulling me closer. Feeling his hot breath against my neck made me cringe outside of his sight.

My breathing nearly stopped as I felt uneasiness wash over me. Being so close to my captor felt wrong, and I could feel my body shake slightly under his touch. Murdoc's long-pointed nails could be felt through my shirt, grazing my stomach slightly. His hold on me was loose and gentle, but having his strong arms wrapped around my small figure left me feeling anything but comfortable. 

After a few moments I moved away from him slightly, and I felt him move his hand from my stomach to my waist, sitting up. I could feel his stare burn into me as he leaned against his arm, and I glanced back at him slightly. The look in his eyes told me everything I needed to know, he was slowly realizing his affection was something I really didn't want. 

He watched me closely as his hand left my waist, and I closed my eyes tightly with anticipation. To my surprise he laid back down, a bit further away from me this time, and he sighed deeply.

"Just go." He simply said.

Before he changed his mind, I sat up quickly, throwing my legs off the bed as I hurried out of his room. As I left, I shut the door softly with a deep breath. The smell of alcohol still lingered in my nose, bringing me to become nauseated once again. 

With another deep breath I found myself walking down the hallway, towards the living room. The idea of getting a breath of fresh air was a more than appealing thought. My legs still trembled from anxiety as I made my way into the living room, a sigh of relief escaping me. When I reached the large sliding glass door I opened it quickly, a gust of the cold night air bringing a chill rushing down my spine. 

Before I walked outside I scanned the wall for a lightswitch, running my fingers over the closest one in curiosity. Flicking it up, my eyes widened as rows of sparkling string lights came on from the patio. Without thinking about it, I ambled slowly outside, mesmerized by the sight of them. 

My arms wrapped tightly around my chest as I shivered slightly, moving my attention to the beach below the tall awning. The fresh air felt invigorating, giving me a sense of relief. 

I was torn from the moment by a hand on my shoulder. I involuntarily jumped, turning around to see 2D standing behind me, a jacket in his hand. 

"I-I didn't mean to scare you." He stammered quietly.

Running a hand through my hair, I let off a deep sigh at the sight of the blue haired boy. He lifted the jacket in his hand slightly, motioning for me to take it. 

"I saw you come out here from the kitchen," 2D explained, "I thought, 'It's pretty late out, wonder where she's going.' And I realized just how cold it was, it's bloody freezing out here, so I thought I'd bring you a coat. Problem was, I was carrying two cups of orange juice—" He slowly stopped himself and his rapid hand gestures as his eyes fell on my confused face.

"You looked cold." He simply said.

My eyes moved to the jacket before reaching out and taking it from him, and my brows furrowed in thought. 

"Thanks..." I murmured, "Murdoc's asleep, why'd you have two cups of—"

He cut me off by waving his hands, "Don't worry about it."

A small laugh escaped me, his unusually awkward behavior catching me off guard a bit. Without a word I pulled my arms through the jacket and wrapped it over my shoulders, crossing my arms once again. He shot me a small smile as we stood there in silence before grabbing out his pack of cigarettes and lighter. For the first time I noticed his missing front teeth, and I chuckled a bit. Placing a cigarette in his mouth, he glanced past me towards the water.

"You said Murdoc's asleep?" 2D asked with a tilt of his head.

"Yeah, I'd be surprised if he got up after drinking so much." I responded quietly.

"Let me show ya' something." He offered, motioning me to him. 

My curiosity got the best of me as I followed him to the railing, and he pointed down to a small dock off the beach. A large boat caught my eye, another small sailboat next to it, and I looked at him in confusion.

"You guys have boats?" A hint of desperation in my voice.

He shot me another small smile as he lit the cigarette in his mouth, taking a long drag as he raised an eyebrow at me.

"I'll take you out on the water tomorrow," He spoke through a cloud of smoke, "Don't get too excited, though. We won't go far."

Despite the disappointment I felt washing over me, I couldn't help but look forward to getting out of the house properly for once. A day on the water could be nice. 2D's eyes moved to me, his expression changing suddenly.

"About Murdoc—"

"What's smoking like—" 

We both cut ourselves off, shooting each other a short glance before we both opened our mouths to let the other speak. 2D was faster than I was.

"Go on." He chuckled awkwardly, running a hand through his hair.

"I was just curious," I cleared my throat. "Does it help? Smoking, I mean...with anxiety?"

2D tilted his head slightly, grabbing the cigarette from his mouth with a small chuckle. He handed it to me slowly, and I stared at his offered hand, my face flushing red in embarrassment. 

"I-I..." I started, at a loss for words.

"It's just a puff of a fag, lass. No need to be so..." His voice trailed off. "Dramatic."

"I'm sorry?" I choked, taken aback slightly.

2D looked at me in confusion before his eyes darted to the cigarette for a moment.

"A cigarette, sorry." He corrected himself.

Shaking my head with a small smile, I slowly grabbed the cigarette from him, gripping it between my pointer finger and thumb. He chuckled a bit, reaching out his hands, one to grab my wrist and the other to adjust the cigarette between my middle and index fingers.

"It's not that kind of roll-up." 2D explained with a laugh. 

With a grin, I took a deep breath, bringing it to my lips slowly. On my next inhale I took a drag off the cigarette, the smoke filling my lungs with a pinching feeling. Immediately I began to cough, and I could hear him laugh once again as I brought the cigarette away from my mouth.

"Holy shit." I choked through a cough, my head spinning.

I felt his hand gently hit my back a few times, easing my cough slightly. Very slowly, my breathing went back to normal and I stood back up properly, looking back at him with tears approaching my eyes.

"Did it help?" He asked with a smile, holding in laughter.

"Yeah, helped loads. Am I ever gonna breathe again?" I asked, only half joking.

"You'll be alright." He patted my back again. 

My eyes met his, our smiles never fading as I felt his hand rest on my back. I couldn't tell if it was the burning in my lungs, but I could feel sparks where it laid.

"I think I have pneumonia." I joked.

As the words left my mouth, I felt his hand twitch on my back, noticing they were above my lungs. He hesitated a moment before patting me one final time and dropping his hand to his side.

"Never killed anyone." He responded, an air of awkwardness rising quickly.

With a deep sigh, my lungs filling with the fresh air, I handed 2D back his cigarette. He took it with a nod, and I looked out to the water once more before a yawn escaped me. 

"It's late..." I started but he nodded before I could continue.

2D ran his hand through his hair with an awkward chuckle. 

"I understand..." He said softly.

A smile crossed my face as I looked back up at him. As I went to pull the jacket from my shoulders, he held out a hand.

"Just keep it," he started, "A lot of our clothes get passed around, mostly jackets 'n stuff."

"What?" I asked.

"Well—we kinda just wear each other's. Sounds weird now that I put it out there. But you get used to it after awhile."

My stomach turned thinking back to the white tee Murdoc tried to give me. Shaking off the thought, I continued.

"Thanks, Stuart." I smiled again. 

"No worries. Sleep well, Juliet." He said behind a puff of smoke with a smile. 

I hugged the jacket closer to my shoulders to escape the chill that chased me back through the doors of the house. As I closed the door, I took another look at him outside, smoking into the cloudless night, an infinite sea of stars above him. The door pulled closed as I turned to head back to my room. I shoved my hands into the pockets of the jacket, and felt a small box of some sort. A smile formed on my face as I pulled out the pack of cigarettes 2D was holding. 

For the first time on the island, I didn't feel alone.


	7. Chapter 7

My hands trembled as I picked up my backpack off the floor.

School started at 7:55 everyday, and as always I was ready to leave by 8:15. Trying my best not to make a lot of noise, I made my way through my house slowly. The only sound that could be heard was the buzz of the television static from the living room. Mornings always felt eerie but holidays always made it worse. 

Creeping through the house quietly, I held my breath as I made it to the front door. The smell of a cigarette filled my nose as I reached for the handle, and I closed my eyes tightly as I tried to open the locked door. 

"What are you wearing?" My dad's deep voice rang from behind me, and I let out a small breath of air.

Keeping my grip on the handle, I turned to face him slowly, our gazes meeting. My eyes trailed down my own figure, bewilderment crossing my face as I looked at my outfit.

"I don't understand..." I softly answered, slowly meeting his stare once more.

"You think because your mother isn't here you can dress like a whore?" His voice was stern.

I looked back up at him as he stumbled towards me, gripping a green bottle in his hand. A sharp exhale escaped my nose as I looked him up and down, yellow stains on his shirt.

"Did you not sleep, are you still drunk?" I asked, equal amounts of concern and frustration in my voice.

"Don't dodge my question. Go change. Now." He demanded, tripping over his words and his own feet.

"You're pathetic. Mom would've left you if she were still here—"

Immediately, I felt his fist connect with my jaw, throwing my head to the side. Pain throbbed through my face as my hand nurtured the wound. I looked back up at him slowly, instead seeing a tall man with green skin and dark eyes in my father's place.

"Don't talk back to me." He growled, his voice changing to the basists raspy tone.

"Murdoc...?" I stammered, a new wave of emotions falling over me.

Before I had time to react, his hand found its way through my hair, gripping my scalp roughly. 

"She'd still be here if it wasn't for you." Murdoc's voice echoed my father's words.

"Mom died b-because she was sick." My voice was shaky as tears filled my eyes.

Murdoc pulled me closer to him, staring deeply into my eyes, he bellowed, "Your mom died because God punished her for having you."

Tears fell down my face slowly as I closed my eyes, suppressing a sob. When I did this, his grip on me loosened, and I fell to the floor quickly. Breathing deeply through my nose, my eyes shot open and I found myself alone by the door. Murdoc had vanished, faint pillows of smoke surrounding me slowly as I looked around the room.

Breaking the silence, I bawled into my hands, the suppressed emotions becoming too much. The walls echoed my cries, amplifying them into the oblivion of the dreamscape.

***

A shiver was sent down my spine as I remembered my dream.

Waiting for 2D, I tried to push away the memory of last night as anxiety pierced at my stomach. The last thing I needed to think about was childhood trauma in a place like this. Where I was, I had no control over most things, the only thing I could do was try and work on my physical and mental health. Clearly this was becoming a much harder task the longer I was on the island.

Breaking me from my thoughts, my attention turned to Murdoc as he entered the room. His eyes met mine briefly before he ambled to the sliding glass door, looking out at the water. The silence between us was eerie, and I felt my body tense as he crossed his arms. 

Tension rose as he turned around, his eyes darting from me to the kitchen. Gulping, I began twiddling my thumbs together nervously. His dark eyes watched me for a few more moments before he let out a scoff with a shake of his head. Without a word, he made his way out of the room, and my gaze fell to the floor in confusion. 

Before I could even process what had happened, 2D's voice broke the silence in the room.

"You ready?" He asked, walking towards me holding what looked like a lunch box and a fishing pole. 

"Yeah." I simply replied. 

2D made his way to where I was, and a small smile formed on my face as I looked him up and down. He was wearing a black shirt with the sleeves cut off, a red bandana around his neck, and a white sailor's hat. With an awkward chuckle he returned the smile, handing me a hat similar to his. I shot him a confused look as he did this, and he took a few steps closer, placing it on my head gently.

"Gotta protect your face from the sun." He explained.

Without a reply, I stood up, adjusting the hat more comfortably to my head. He gave me a small nod before walking towards the hallway, and I followed quickly after him. Barely making it out into the hall, we were met by Murdoc, who was leaning against one of the walls with an apple in his hand. Our gazes met, and I could see his jaw tense as his eyes slowly moved to the hat I was wearing. 

"Why are you..." 2D began, his voice trailing off. 

"What?" Murdoc asked.

"What are you doing...?"

"Eating my breakfast since you've taken up my maid's morning," Murdoc snapped, taking a bite of the apple; he continued between chews, "Why do you two look like you're late for a YMCA reunion? Wrong band, mate."

My breathing hitched in my throat as I felt a feeling of anxiety pulse through me. My eyes moved to 2D who's attention was on Murdoc, yet he remained oddly calm.

"Gonna take 'er out on the water for a bit, maybe catch some lunch." 2D explained simply.

Murdoc's gaze moved from Stuart to me, and I took a small step behind the blue haired boy. The bassist pushed himself off the wall, straightening his posture before walking over to me. The hair on my arms stood on end as he did this, and I cowered from him slightly.

He swallowed before replying, "Well, alright." 

My head instinctively tilted in confusion at the calmness in his voice compared to the hint of anger I could see in his eyes. In the moment I decided it was best to keep my mouth shut as my eyes moved to the floor slowly. 

Before the tension in the room got any worse, I felt 2D's hand pull at my arm gently, motioning me to follow him. My gaze met Murdoc's once more as he did this, before turning and following 2D down the hallway.

"Stay outta the lighthouse." Murdoc called to us, and 2D gave him a small nod from over his shoulder.

We made our way down the hall, and I followed 2D quietly. As we continued through the building, we came to a stop at a sliding metal door. 2D immediately reached his arm out to push a button on the wall, and I quickly realized this was an elevator. After a few moments the door slid open, and 2D gestured for me to enter.

"Ladies first." He chuckled lightly.

With a small smile I walked in, my eyes wandering the inside curiously. He quickly followed, wasting no time as he shut the door upon entering the elevator. With an awkward silence, we rode it to the ground floor.

The air was hot and humid outside, and my eyes strained to see anything as they adjusted to the brightness of the sun. 2D led me out to the docks, and my attention quickly turned to the huge pirate-ship-like boat that was tethered to one of the docks. 

"Holy shit." Was all I could say at the sight of it.

2D looked at the ship as I said this, shaking his head slightly. He pointed to a much smaller sailboat that was near us with a chuckle.

"This is what we're taking," He motioned to the large ship, "That one's Murdoc's."

Before I could respond he walked to the sailboat and hopped in, moving a few things around before waving me over. Hesitating a bit, I nodded before following him to it slowly, and stopped at the edge of the dock in embarrassment. 2D held out his hand for me to take it, and I shot him a concerned look.

"What? Never been on a boat?" He asked, and I nodded my head. "Don't be nervous."

With that I reached out my hand slowly taking his, and he helped me into the boat. I felt myself trying my best to balance as it swayed from side to side, placing my arms in the air to steady myself. As I did this, a small wave rocked the boat, knocking me off balance. In an attempt to right myself, I lost my footing on the hull, sending me forward through the air. 2D's grip narrowly saved me from a faceplant as I fell onto my back with a sharp grunt.

"You're supposed to catch me." I winced with a small laugh as 2D helped me to my feet.

"I didn't know we were doing trust exercises." He joked.

"My life's cliché enough anyways." I sighed with a smile.

I had never been on a boat before, so I didn't know what seasickness felt like. But as we kept sailing, I felt something very much like seasickness.

Despite feeling a bit nauseous, the small voyage left me feeling relaxed. After choosing a spot decently far off the coast, 2D began baiting his hook so he could fish. We hadn't made much conversation since the awkward moment at the dock, the only sound in the air being the small ripples of water as they hit the boat. 

My gaze followed his hands as he worked, wrapping a small piece of meat to the end of his hook. They were visibly strong, yet he was gentle and slow with his process. This simple observation fascinated me, and oddly enough, it brought a comfort to wash over me in the moment. His small mannerisms and gentle nature reminded me of Ren. 2D wasn't a threat to me, and I knew this.

Shaking away the thoughts, and shoved my hand into one of my pockets, pulling out the pack of cigarettes 2D had given me the night before. Pulling one out, his attention turned to me.

"Thought you might need those." He joked, wiping his hands on his trousers.

"I appreciate it." I responded.

With a small smile I handed him the one in my hand, and he stood up slowly, walking over to me. He sat down across from me as he took the cigarette from my hand, and opened his fishing box to dig out a lighter. As he did this I pulled out a second for myself, placing it between my teeth. 

Finally finding his lighter, he turned back to me, leaning in so he could light the end of my cigarette. Taking a deep breath as the flame burned the end of it, the smoke filled my lungs once again. This time it felt easier, and on my exhale I only slightly coughed. He let out a chuckle as he watched me, taking his time before placing his between his lips and lighting it.

Our eyes met as I pulled the cigarette from my mouth, and he let out a sigh, the smoke from his breath quickly dissipating into the air.

"I'm sorry if I've been a bit hostile since you got here." 2D apologized, and I shook my head.

"Don't be." I responded, taking a deep breath. "It's not your job to be my friend."

His gaze left mine as I spoke, and I could feel a strange tension radiating off him. 

"Murdoc is..." His voice trailed off as if he were finding the right word, "...difficult."

He looked at my hand, the bandage still wrapped tightly around it. I closed it into a tight fist as I drew it close to my chest, and he sighed once again.

"Out of all the things Murdoc has done, this has to be the one thing I don't understand." 2D explained in a soft voice. 

"What?" I questioned.

He looked up at me once again, "Why you?"

A feeling of sadness washed over me, and I turned my face from him. 

"I mean—" He started, clearing his throat a bit, "He went through all this trouble getting you here, but why? Why would he want to hurt someone like you?"

"I wish I had an answer for you, Stuart." I involuntarily snapped, bringing the cigarette to my mouth.

"I didn't mean it like that." 

He took a long drag himself before continuing. 

"I mean for him to do this to someone so... nice, I guess. Innocent." He paused.

"Maybe they'll put my face on the back of a milk carton." I said with a chuckle, my gaze drifting off into the ocean.

"What?" 2D cocked his head.

"American thing." I waved my hand dismissively.

Through my peripherals I saw him glance over at me before taking another puff of his cigarette, watching the infinite blue expanse with me. Without a reply, 2D pulled himself over to where I sat, wrapping one of his arms around me gently. Closing my eyes while being mindful of the cigarette in my hand, I wrapped my arms around his waist. I could feel his body tense as I did this, but slowly he relaxed as my head rested on his shoulder.

Returning the affection, he hugged me back with a deep sigh. We stayed in this position for a few more moments before I lifted my head to meet his gaze, and he smiled slightly.

"Juliet..." 2D started, looking down at where our bodies met briefly. "Don't let Murdoc get to you."

"What do you mean?" I asked as I let go of him. 

He kept one arm around me as he continued, "He has a way of... manipulating people. But you're smart, and he definitely fancies you. Use that."

"I'm not that kind of girl." 

2D fell quiet for a few moments. I could feel his arm tense as he took another long drag off his cigarette, turning his face from me. 

"Heard that one before." He muttered under his breath.

"Sorry?" I raised an eyebrow.

2D eyed me for a moment before taking a deep breath through his nose.

"We had a guitarist, before Noodle." He paused, finally exhaling. "Her name was Paula, Paula Cracker. She was my girlfriend at the time. Really good at playing stringed instruments, although Murdoc thinks she was rubbish. She 'wasn't that kind of girl' either."

"What happened to her?" I wondered. 

"One night, Russ caught Paula and Murdoc..." 2D choked. "They were shagging in the bathrooms back at Kong. After that, Murdoc kicked her from the band and put flyers out for a new guitarist."

I didn't respond as I heard 2D get a bit choked up. 

"He doesn't care about anyone but himself." He sighed once again. "The only reason I joined the band was to make music, but now I'm being held captive on a rotting mound of plastic in the middle of the ocean. All because that bastard bass player wants to make another album, it's mad."

"Have you tried to leave?" 

"Of course." 2D chuckled in a frustrated tone. "Murdoc had me back here by sunrise. And I left at dawn."

It was hard to tell if he was joking.

My eyes closed as I took a drag off my cigarette, my fingers trembling at the news. All hope of one day getting off the island vanished in an instant, and I exhaled deeply. 2D kept quiet, finishing his cigarette and putting it out on the side of the boat. 

Suddenly his arm left me as he stood, making his way to the other side of the boat. I watched him as he picked up his fishing rod, adjusting his line before looking over at me. 

"Ready to learn how to fish?"

***

After spending most of the afternoon out on the water, 2D and I eventually came back to shore. 

We took the elevator back up to the main part of the house, two large and gutted fish slung over 2D's back. He offered to cook the fish for lunch and I declined, still nauseous from being out on the water. 

When we got to the top, I followed 2D down the hallway towards the kitchen. The house was quiet, the sound of our walking echoing through the hall. We made it to the kitchen a few moments later, and he walked to the counter, throwing the fish on it quickly. I pulled out one of the barstools and sat at the island as I watched him wrap the fish in plastic, placing them in the freezer. 

"There you two are. Look at that, I didn't have to call the coast guard this time." 

My head turned to see Murdoc walking into the kitchen, and my heartbeat increased dramatically. 2D turned to him as well, his expression going cold. 

"How was the date?" Murdoc asked, crossing his arms. 

"C'mon, Murdoc." 2D sighed, his face flushing a bit.

"He was teaching me how to fish." I butted in, my jaw tense. 

"That's fine, I'm happy for you." Murdoc looked at me, "I'm sure he loves the attention anyway." 

The tension in the room rose, and I glanced at 2D. His eyes were on the floor, his hands balled into fists by his side. Without a response, he pushed past Murdoc and walked out of the kitchen, clearly upset. It took everything in me not to follow after him, but a quick glance at Murdoc kept me glued where I was. 

We sat in silence for a few moments, his dark eyes watching me from across the room. 

"Now that you're done with your unionized break, you can get some bloody work done." Murdoc said in a stern voice. 

"You're an asshole." I responded, turning my face from him. 

"Here we go again." He groaned, "I was alright with you lying to the both of us when you said you didn't like my music. Now, I would say I was alright with you smashing my things, but I'm not in the habit of lying—something you ought to learn from me, might I add. So far, you've been a rubbish maid."

"Then why am I still here?" I snapped through gritted teeth. 

"Don't make me remind you of your worth, Ms. Morrinson." Murdoc's voice was stern. "Doing as I say is and will always be your top priority. Doing whatever Juliet wants isn't going to cut it. I brought you here to do a fucking job, but instead you go out on fishing dates with my lead singer. Let's not forget that you're replaceable. I don't need you."

"Really?" I challenged, looking over at him. "That's not what you told me last night." 

Murdoc's jaw tensed as I said this, his already present grimace forming a scowl. My eyes widened as I realized how angry he was, opening my mouth to say something but quickly closing it as he made his way to me. Shaking my head, I stood to my feet. As I took a small step back, he grabbed me by my wrist, surely hard enough to leave a bruise. 

Before I had time to react, he pulled me towards him and drew his arm back, the backside of his hand meeting my face quickly. My body fell to the floor from the impact, and I brought my hand to cup my face, a cry of pain emitting from me. 

"You think you can fucking talk to me like that?" Murdoc growled as he towered over my shaking figure, "You're getting bold, Morrinson. So let's have a reminder."

He crouched down next to me, using one of his hands to grab my face, forcing me to look at him. 

"You do what I tell you, and only what I tell you. You don't, we end up back here all over again. I've got plenty of rings to cut up that pretty face of yours." His ring glided against the scar on my cheek, the rough jewel stinging my healing wound. "Got it?" 

Without thinking, I spit as hard as I could, landing directly in the center of his face. He recoiled slightly, bringing a hand to wipe it off with a loud grunt of disapproval. 

"You don't scare me." I hissed, my sudden courage getting the best of me. "You're pathetic."

"You shouldn't have said that." A terrifying look of anger crossed his face, sending a shudder down my spine.

His hand found its way through my hair as he suddenly pulled me to my feet by my scalp. A distressed cry of pain emitted from me as he dragged me out of the room, his grip tightening as he led me down the hallway. Attempting to free myself from his grasp, I brought my hands to his, prying at his fingers as tears fell down my face. 

A few moments later we reached my room, and he threw me to the ground quickly upon entering. I pushed myself up off the floor, leaning on my arms as I watched him shut the door behind him. My eyes widened in horror as he turned to me, toggling with the buckle on his belt. Words failed me as he slid it out from around his waist, folding the belt and holding the two ends tightly in his hand. Tears streamed down my face, hitting the floor below me as I tried to wrap my brain around what was happening. My back hit the side of my bed as I tried to move away from him, but his eyes told me that he wasn't giving this a second thought. 

"Murdoc, please, I'm so sorry..." I whispered in a raspy voice.

"You're sorry?" Murdoc almost laughed at my statement. "You know, I don't want to have to do this, but with a mouth like yours, you leave me no choice."

"Don't hurt me, please." I begged, trying my best to talk him out of this. "I-I'll keep my mouth shut, I promise. I won't complain, and-and I'll keep to myself—"

"Enough!" 

A groan escaped him as he gripped the belt tighter in his hands, a mixture of emotions crossing his face. He let out a frustrated growl before walking over to me quickly, pulling me to my feet by my arm. 

"Listen to me." He snarled, his face inches from mine. "One chance, that's it. Do you understand me?"

Nodding my head in response, his grip on my arm loosened as he slowly backed away. 

"Drop the attitude, or I won't be so nice next time." Murdoc threatened, letting go of me roughly. 

Before I had a chance to breathe, he had already left the room. While I was grateful for being spared, I couldn't wrap my head around where this sudden mercy came from. He just let me off, with a measly hit and a warning. Relief fell over my shaky body as I realized I had got out of beating, but fear slowly surfaced in my mind at the thought of talking back again and being hit. That was the last thing I wanted. 

Next time I'd think twice before opening my mouth.


	8. Chapter 8

My body ached as I sat up in my bed. 

The image of Murdoc beating me surfaced in my mind, sending a shiver down my spine. It was hard for me to do much of anything with that thought in my head, and I hadn't left my room the entire day. Murdoc didn't check on me at all, most likely leaving me to process what he said as further punishment. 

Looking over towards the opposite wall, I saw the clock read 10:30 PM. My stomach growled, and I let out a deep sigh, pushing my feet off the bed. Pondering the idea of getting something to eat, I stared at the door to my room. 

With a small sigh, I stood to my feet, my legs shaking under my weight. Being as quiet as I could, I made my way to the door, and stepped out into the hall. I ambled past the bathroom quietly. 

As I made my way towards the kitchen I heard voices coming from the living room and I turned my head in confusion. The lights were dim, virtually off, which only made my curiosity grow stronger as the voices became more clear.

"Murdoc..." I heard a familiar voice slur. 

As I came to the opening to the living room I peeked in to see both Murdoc and 2D sitting at opposite ends of the couch, their backs facing me. The lighting was dim, and the room was lit by a strange, eerie orange color. The lights were off, only candles lit up the large room. I watched as 2D brought his glass of whiskey to his lips and took a large swig, Murdoc paying no attention as he read a book. 

"Murdoc, listen to m-me..."

"Just shut it, would yah?" Murdoc snapped, looking up at him for a quick moment. 

2D's expression went cold as they sat there in silence. A few moments later he moved over to the other side of the couch, placing one of his hands on Murdoc's leg.

"Muds..." 2D cooed, slowly moving even closer to Murdoc, and I sat there watching in confusion. 

Murdoc looked up from his book and gave 2D a very perplexed stare, his eyebrow raised as he watched the blue haired boy move on top of him. 2D wrapped his arms around Murdoc, setting his head on his shoulder.

"Stuart... We're not..." Murdoc struggled to find the right words as he sat there. 

His confused look suddenly turned to a frown, his stare going cold. 

"This isn't why you're here. I'm not the one for you... We've been over this."

"I don't care." 2D whined to him, digging his face in Murdoc's neck.

"Well you should, you git." Murdoc snapped and 2D laughed, taking another drink of whiskey. 

Murdoc let off a small growl as he grabbed the glass from him and slammed it on the side table. 

"I think you've had enough."

"Says who? I can have as much to drink as I want you old goth—"

"That's it!" Murdoc bellowed, pushing 2D off him and standing up. He grabbed 2D by his forearm and pulled him to his feet. "This happens every time you drink and I'm bloody sick of it, I'll tell ya'!" 

He got very close to 2D, the same way he's done to me in the past. 

Murdoc continued, "This isn't why you're here! You're here to make an album. I don't want to have to remind you of this, but you don't... you don't actually feel that for me. I don't want you to feel that for me, got it?"

"This is because of her, isn't it?" 2D asked in a broken tone, his eyes beginning to tear up, "No time for me anymore."

Murdoc's expression changed as the anger left his eyes, a look of guilt crossing his face. He looked to the floor for a moment before sighing deeply. His gaze met the boy's once again.

"Listen, kid." Murdoc muttered softly to him, wiping a tear from his face. "You've had too much to drink."

"Tell me I'm wrong." There was a hint of desperation in 2D's voice.

"You're wrong." Murdoc said quickly, "You need to go to bed. Let's not do this tonight, yeah?"

2D did nothing but nod quietly, letting Murdoc grasp his hand in his as he led him towards the door. Realizing they were headed my way, a sense of panic fell over me. Taking a few steps back, I failed to hide myself behind the wall. Murdoc's gaze met mine as he walked out of the room. His stare turned sour as he got closer to me, letting go of 2D's hand. 2D looked up slightly and flashed me a weak grin.

"Goodnight, Juliet..." He slurred.

"Goodnight, 2D." I whispered, glancing back at Murdoc who still glared at me.

"Go on to bed, kid." Murdoc pushed 2D gently in the direction of his room, and the boy stumbled down the hall.

I froze for a moment as he looked back at me.

"I don't even care what you heard," he started, "Why are you up and out of your room? Thought you'd decided to take a vacation day after our little argument."

"I was..." I hesitated.

Murdoc looked over at a clock in the kitchen before cutting me off with a few grumbles.

"Y'know what, I don't care. You learned your lesson, yeah?" He spoke unusually quickly.

"Y-yes..." I stuttered, moreso with confusion than fear.

"Good, good. Fuck off now." He said, gesturing me away.

Without asking any questions, I continued on to the kitchen. While my back was turned, I heard the door leading outside open and close. When I turned back around, Murdoc was gone. 

Making my way to the cupboard near the fridge, I grabbed out a glass and filled it with water. Bringing it to the island counter, I picked out an orange which I began to peel slowly. My body ached once again, and I closed my eyes for a moment.

Suddenly I heard a door open, and the floor beneath me vibrated slightly with the familiar noise of the elevator running. With a deep sigh, I turned back to what I was doing, and took a bite out of one of the orange slices. 

***

My room shook, waking me from my sleep. 

The clock on the wall read 12:24 AM as I heard the sound of the elevator once again, a small yawn emitting from me. Closing my eyes for a brief moment, I took a deep breath through my nose as I relaxed into my sheets. Murdoc had been gone for awhile, and I couldn't help but feel curious about where he went. It was unlike him to do things out of the house unannounced so late at night. 

My eyes shot open at the sound of my door opening, and I looked over to see Murdoc enter my room. He stumbled over himself a bit as he closed the door behind him, and I sat up quickly. 

"Murdoc?" I could barely manage saying his name, my voice groggy.

Without a response, he glanced at me from where he stood. He was holding a dark brown bottle in his right hand tightly, and I immediately assumed it was a whiskey or rum. My body began to shake slightly, sitting up a bit more as I was now on edge.

"I'm sorry but can we not do this right now?" I asked, pulling my legs to my chest slightly, "If this is about me eavesdropping on you and Stuart—"

"I don't care what you heard that stupid knobjockey say, slag." His voice was slurred, and a sudden feeling of dread washed over me.

My voice got quiet, "Then why are you here?"

"Don't play dumb, Juliet." Murdoc scorned, taking a swig of his drink.

A gasp escaped my mouth as I realized what he was implying, and I pushed myself away from him instinctively. My heart race increased as I went into a full panic, shaking my head dramatically. 

"Y-you're drunk." I stammered, my breath stuck in my throat. 

Setting the bottle on top of the dresser, he chuckled with malevolence. My eyes never left him as I watched him drunkenly pull off his black jean jacket, revealing the dark tank he wore underneath. The sight of his bare arms brought even more discomfort to wash over me, knowing he could easily overpower me if he tried. After tossing the jacket to the side, he started to walk towards me.

"Don't touch me." I warned in a stern voice and he laughed. "I will fucking—"

"You're in no position to be giving me orders." Murdoc scoffed, cutting me off. 

"I'm sorry for talking back, and for everything else—"

"Shut up." He cut me off as he reached the bed, his jaw tense. "Stop acting like you don't want to."

"No." I refused, pressing my back up against the wall in defiance. "You're delusional, you've been drinking. This isn't what I want, and neither do you."

This earned me a glare from my captor, his biceps tensing as his stare burned into me. Suddenly he reached out, grabbing my ankle and pulling me towards him quickly. I stayed in a seated position as I began pushing his hands away from my shoulders. Ignoring my clear defiance, he leaned his face down to my neck, leaving soft kisses along my jawline. The gentleness of the act was insulting, only making me feel more nauseous from his touch. From this distance I could smell the alcohol on his breath, and tears swelled in my eyes.

"Murdoc, stop!" I begged through a cry. 

His eyes met mine as I said this, and a small grin formed on his face. Before responding, he planted a kiss on my cheek, and I closed my eyes tightly. Impatience and anger slowly came over me as I pushed at his chest, attempting to put distance between us. 

"Have you lost your fucking mind?" I screamed, pushing him away from me. 

"Stop being a little priss." Murdoc bellowed, grabbing my face with his hand. "Now's the time to spit on me, since you love to do that so much." 

My eyes widened as I saw him reach his other hand towards the hem of his jeans, and my breathing nearly stopped. 

"That's enough!" I growled in retaliation, digging my nails into his arm. 

Before he could manage to react, I retaliated and kicked at his shin, causing him to let go of me and fall backwards. As the moment for my escape came, I got up from the bed quickly, running towards the far end of the room. Frustrated tears fell down my face as I cowered in the corner, turning to see him standing up. 

"Don't be so frigid, it's insulting." He growled, his voice more slurred than before. "It's hard to get it up when ya' act like such a prude."

"Fuck you!" I spat as I shot him an uninviting glare. "What was your plan? To get drunk and then just come in here and somehow convince me to have sex? Did you actually think that I'd be okay with that?"

"I would've liked that." Murdoc mocked with a scoff. "Don't get pissy with me, love, you've been giving me the mixed signals—"

"No. Don't you dare try and moralize this. You know I don't like you. I never have and I never will!" I cried, my hands forming fists, "You've really outdone yourself with this. Just when I thought you couldn't get any worse!"

"You know what? You're not even worth all this bloody effort, you hear me?" Murdoc started, gesturing with his hands as he spoke. "You think you're something special don't you? Well I think you're just another dumb slag with daddy issues. I could easily replace you just based on your rubbish housekeeping skills alone. Hell, I could replace ya' with one of my millions of fans; at least one of 'em might fancy giving me a quick jobby between shifts without it being some sort a' transaction." 

"You're fucking crazy." I said weakly, my body shaking with adrenaline. 

My gaze met his, and my breathing stopped for a moment as he glared at me, his jaw tense. 

"The fact you made it a day working in a place run by Cade is beyond me," He continued. "Maybe the crowd at Solomon's is softer than at his hotel, Westward. In fact, I'm surprised you didn't make your living off of pressing charges when a lad looks at you for too long." 

Murdoc laughed, "You like playing the little victim act, don't ya'? It gets you all excited when you get to parade around on your imaginary moral high ground and do that infuriatingly fabricated display of helplessness every time things don't go your way. I mean, you play up the whole victim act so much, it's amazing that Renny wasn't the typical bad boy shithead every barmy bird like you falls for. Classic story of a girl running away from her family and into the arms of an abuser type a' thing. You'd be surprised—" 

"I didn't really get a choice in this version of the story, did I?" I snapped, tearing up. 

"Give me a break..." He said with a groan. "What you need to do is lighten up, you depressing sod."

My eyes stayed on Murdoc as he walked over to where his bottle sat, and he quickly grabbed it. He took another swig, turning to me as he leaned against the dresser.

"You're right, I should've just shut up and let you take want you wanted—"

"No no no, don't you start that, 'I'll do anything but clean'. You know, you're lucky you're so fit, or I'd gotten rid of you awhile ago. You're nothing but a bloody tease." Murdoc chuckled mostly to himself, his voice going soft for a moment, "But then I wouldn't get to see those pretty eyes everyday, would I? Shine just like rhinestones, I'll tell ya'."

Murdoc paused, taking another sip of his drink as his gaze met mine.

"I—ah, I don't quite know why I just said that..." He laughed once again, holding up his bottle. "This rum's good, I'll tell you that for nothing."

There was a moment of silence between us as I tried to process what was happening. Everything about this situation was getting sadder and more embarrassing by the second.

Although I was annoyed, his words still struck a wrong chord in me, and I reached my limit of insults I could take. My jaw tensed as we stared at each other, and I turned my gaze from him quickly. Tears swelled at the corners of my eyes, and I let out a small whimper.

"Get out." I finally said, pointing towards the door to my room; my fingers trembling slightly.

He scoffed, "Oh come on, you need to—"

"I said, get out!" I screamed, cutting him off. 

Murdoc fell silent, his gaze meeting the floor as he adjusted his shirt. My jaw tensed as I watched him, and I pressed my back up against the wall behind me. His tongue rolled over his bottom lip slowly as he sat there for a few moments. Raising his eyebrows with a sigh and a shake of his head, he finally retreated, standing up from where he was leaning. He shot me one last glance before he turned for the door, making his way out of my room.

As soon as the door shut, my body slid down the wall, my bottom hitting the floor gently. I took a few deep breaths, closing my eyes as a tear fell down my face. Murdoc was clearly drunk out of his mind, but what he had done left me shivering in fear. Still, part of me felt sorry for him. This feeling of empathy and pity was frustrating, and I cursed under my breath at the thought. 

Murdoc was the last person to deserve sympathy.


	9. Chapter 9

The events of the previous night kept me from leaving my room all day. 

My breathing was steady, yet my hands trembled; images of the night before playing through my mind. Watching painful imitations of the event over and over made my stomach turn. The hurtful things Murdoc had said only made this feeling worse, my heart splintering as they repeated in my mind. 

If I had just ran to my car, or screamed for help the night he took me, none of this would have happened.

Taking a deep breath, I finally folded the shirt I had been holding in my hands for a few moments, adding it to the pile on my bed. It was around 12 o'clock, and I hadn't seen the boys all morning. Part of me was relieved to have alone time, especially after what had happened; but another part was scared of what Murdoc would say about my absence. 

Anxiety kept me from picking up another item of clothing, and just as I took a deep breath, the door to my room opened from behind me. My breathing stopped as someone walked inside, the sound of their boots echoing off the hardwood. 

"Where bloody hell have you been all day?" Murdoc's raspy voice asked from behind me, and I cringed out of his sight. 

The question irritated me, and I chose to ignore it, picking up another shirt as I continued what I was doing. I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of my respect, not after what he did. 

"Juliet." His voice was stern but I held my ground. He sighed, "I really don't have the patience for this today."

As I sat down the folded shirt, I brought my hand to my face, wiping my eyes in silence. An overwhelming amount of pent up emotion began slowly falling over me, and I bit my lip as I heard him walk towards where I stood. My body tensed as I felt his fingers touch my lower back softly, and I jumped a bit as his palm joined them just above my waist. Frozen in fear, my fingers began to shake at his touch, and a small whimper escaped me.

"What's going on?" He asked, too close to my ear for comfort.

Anger erupted inside me as he said this; the concern in his voice was insulting. I pushed away from him, freeing myself from his spurious comfort. 

"Don't act like you give a shit." I growled, my legs beginning to shake.

His gaze moved up and down my body before our eyes met; his stare cold and uninviting. My jaw tensed as he shook his head, his brows furrowing. 

"Good, I can drop the act." Any trace of softness or care fell from his tone in an instant, "I don't know what's crawled up your arse, but I'm not putting up with this attitude of yours, sort it out." 

"Right." I laughed with a scoff, crossing my arms. "The fact you're reprimanding me right now... after what you've done." 

My voice trailed off as frustrated tears swelled at my eyes, and I looked away from him. 

"What the hell are you on about? You're not still miffed about the toilet thing surely? You asked for that." Murdoc questioned, masking what sounded like genuine concern under a thick layer of sarcasm. "I'm not apologizing for what happened the other day when you ran your mouth, you deserved that too."

His questions confused me, and my arms relaxed slightly. Ignoring the rudeness of his statements, my eyes met his once again, and I tilted my head. 

"What?" Is all I could manage as a realization fell over me. "L-last night... you..."

"I?" 

"You were drunk..."

"Yeah. Pissed outta my mind." Murdoc stated, "Still am a little bit if we're being honest. What's this got to do with you not doing your job?"

A sudden nauseous feeling fell over me, and I uncrossed my arms as I ran my hands through my hair. Murdoc's face fell to the floor, and I almost thought I could see a look of remorse etched there, but when I blinked it vanished. He clearly didn't have a clue what happened, and there was no point in bickering with him about it.

"You know what, forget it." I finally broke the silence, taking a deep breath. "Never happened."

"Juliet..." Murdoc started, rubbing the back of his neck, "Whatever I—"

"Whatever exactly." I cut him off suddenly, anger speaking for me, "I guess it's not important if you don't think so, sir."

To my surprise, he didn't respond; crossing his arms as his tongue slowly rolled over his bottom lip. Grabbing 2D's pile of folded clothes off my bed, I shot Murdoc a sarcastic smile before making my way out of the room. 

Quickening my pace as I walked down the hallway, a tear fell down my face. Murdoc clearly had no self control when he drank, and it was now my responsibility to understand that to avoid these situations. As much as I wanted to place the blame on him, I couldn't help but feel like it was my fault for being so naive. 

As I reached 2D's room, I wiped the tears from my cheek with a deep breath. The door was closed and a faint shuffling could be heard from inside. Balling my hand into a soft fist, I hesitated to knock on his door. Before I did, it opened suddenly, revealing a very hungover 2D with a cigarette hanging from his lips. The only thing he was wearing was his trousers from the night before; his hair a spiky mess.

"Hey." He murmured, eyeing me up and down for a moment. 

"Hi." I replied with a meek smile.

Stepping aside, he motioned me inside and I walked in quickly. As I made my way to the other side of the room, he shut the door. Setting the clothes on his dresser, I noticed his bed was a mess, his sheets scattered around in piles on the floor.

"Everything okay?" 2D asked, rubbing his eyes a bit.

Taking a deep breath through my nose, I decided against telling him what happened. While part of me wanted to, the other part knew it would only cause a fuss.

"It's just—" I hesitated, grabbing the comforter off the ground as I started to make his bed. "I don't want to talk about it. It's nothing."

"It's definitely not, look at you." He responded, watching me as I tucked the sheet under the mattress.

"Maybe being on the island isn't my favorite thing, okay?" I retorted at his pushiness, picking up a sheet off the floor. "I'll wash this..."

Avoiding my clear digression, 2D's gaze moved to the floor; his voice low, "This isn't about what you heard last night, is it?"

"Yeah, it is." I lied, my voice quiet.

We both sat in an awkward silence, the sound of me fluffing his pillows was the only noise that echoed through the room. In my peripheral vision, I could see 2D slowly run his free hand through his blue locks with a sigh. Taking a drag off his cigarette, he moved closer to me, leaning on the dresser. 

He hesitated for a moment before asking, "What did he do...?" 

"Nothing that concerns you." I answered seriously.

"Wasn't my fault, was it?" He questioned, insecurity prevailing in his voice.

"Stuart, it's not about you!" I snapped in a harsh tone of voice, gripping the sheet I was holding tighter as I picked another up off the floor.

A crashing sound echoed through the room as a bottle of pills fell from the sheet, dropping onto the hardwood floor. Before he could say anything, I leaned down and picked them up, letting go of the sheets in my hands. A small gasp escaped me as I read the prescription. 

"Why do you have..." My voice trailed off as I noticed more prescriptions on his bedside table.

Picking up another I shook my head, reading it in confusion.

"Juliet... listen—"

"I-is there something wrong, are you sick?" Concern was ever-present in my voice as I continued. "People don't just casually have morphine and vicodin lying around, Stuart. Are you in pain?"

"Juliet." His voice was stern and he took a deep breath. "I was in an accident a few years back..."

"An accident?"

"Murdoc, well... When we met, Murdoc ran me over with his car—"

"He did—what?"

"It's not important." 2D sighed, taking another drag off his cigarette before continuing, "I was given medication for the pain, and well, it makes me feel better. I-I don't think I'd be able to put up with him without it."

Another air of awkwardness rose between us, and I closed my eyes slowly. After setting the bottles down, my face fell in my hands. Turning and sitting down on his bed, I took a deep breath. Without a word, he sat down next to me, rubbing my back softly.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled against my better judgement. "It's none of my business."

"Don't be sorry." 2D started, clearly struggling to find the right wording, "...I know how Murdoc gets, and well... If ya' need someone to talk to, I'm 'ere."

"I think I just need some space right now," I explained, leaning into his touch slightly. "It's just hard to get alone time when he's always on my back."

2D's hand stopped moving for a moment as he looked to the floor. He turned his body to me suddenly, and leaned in close; a small smile snaked across his face. 

"Use the elevator, go spend some time by yourself on the beach." He suggested, gently pushing me to a standing position. "I'll take care of Murdoc."

"Are you sure?" I asked softly as he picked the sheet up off the ground.

"Yeah." He cooed with reassurance.

As we both stood, our bodies were close. He towered over me slightly, and I smiled awkwardly at the differences in our heights. Before I could respond, he drew me into a hug, and my head rested on his chest in surprise. I relaxed into his grip and took a deep breath before we both pulled away. 

He ushered me to the door, "Go, I'll take care of it."

***

The elevator door opened, and a ray of sunlight hit my eyes.

Squinting as I walked out, I took a deep breath, the fresh air calming my nerves. A cool wind filled my lungs, deterred by the warmth of the sun. The sounds of the ocean rang in my ears, as I walked down the wooden steps slowly, my bare feet meeting the pink plastic. 

My eyes wandered to the lighthouse to my right; it was tall, white, and had a large dome on top adjourning a huge rotating spotlight. Remembering what Murdoc had said about staying away from it the first time 2D and I went fishing, only made me more interested in finding out why. Curiosity struck me as I began walking towards the structure, the abstract top catching my attention. The beauty of the building was astonishing, leaving me wondering how such a thing could be on Plastic Beach. 

Never had I imagined I'd relate so much to a structure. We both were things on the island that didn't belong. We stood out like sore thumbs compared to everything else on the island. Maybe it was something in the air, but the slight insanity of the thought brought the corners of my mouth to form a smile. I understand you, lighthouse. I said to myself with a chuckle, my eyes moving to the ground in front of me as I continued towards it. 

Despite what had happened the night before, I was feeling relaxed. The time alone helped, and knowing that Murdoc wouldn't be able to catch me off guard outside the house was a relieving thought. For the most part, I wanted to give myself credit for not completely losing it when I saw him earlier, yet I wouldn't have been surprised if I did. It was best for me to stay off of his radar for as long as I could; if I didn't make any issues then maybe he'd just forget about me entirely. 

"Yeah, right." I almost chuckled at the thought. 

Remembering the pack of cigarettes 2D gave me, I dug my hand in my pocket and quickly pulled it out. As I continued towards the lighthouse, I found the old lighter I had snagged from the kitchen. I put the cigarette to my lips, lighting it after a few attempts from the worn out lighter. Pungent smoke filled my lungs with a pinching sensation, and I held it there for the extra kick before breathing out slowly. My mind went fuzzy in the best way, releasing hold on all the negative thoughts in my mind. All my anxiety slowly slipped away as I let out a sigh, taking in the beauty around me. 

By the time I finished my cigarette, I had reached the lighthouse. Flicking the butt on the ground in front of me, I took in the sight of the building from where I stood. While being quite large, it was smaller than I had originally anticipated. My eyes moved to the wooden door, and I looked behind myself instinctively, knowing Murdoc wouldn't want me snooping around here. Without much consideration to the idea of being caught, I proceeded to the door and opened it slowly. 

The space was dark, only a few small blinking lights shining from across the room. The light from the outside was enough for me to find the lightswitch on the wall to my right, and I flicked it up carefully. After a few moments, a couple of buzzing sounds rang out as the bulbs came on, illuminating the room. 

An overwhelming feeling of confusion fell over me as I took in what I was looking at. There was a lot of random equipment scattered around, along with wires and tools. Empty bottles of rum seemed to be a recurring sight as I walked forward, scanning my environment closely. My eyes caught a glimpse of a radio, seemingly normal until I got a closer look. My feet nearly failed me as I walked to the desk at the far end of the room, eyeing the device in curiosity. It seemed to be heavily modified, retrofitted to do whatever Murdoc was using it for. He was far more intelligent than he initially let on, and this scared me immensely. 

My attention turned to the opposite side of the room as a spark burst from a large set of wires hanging from the ceiling. Noticing an abundance of wires leading below the stairs, I ambled towards them slowly. There was a figure in the shadows, and my heart skipped a beat as I got closer, noticing it was oddly human-like. 

"Hello?" I softly called out, but there was no answer. 

Trying to get a better view of what I was looking at, I cautiously walked towards the stairs. Crouching down as I got closer, I noticed what looked like... hair. As I slowly began to notice the clothes on the figure, and the hat upon its head, I realized what it was. 

It was a girl.

My eyes widened, a gasp catching in my throat as even more confusion fell over me. She looked no older than 17, dressed in shorts and a black tank. Another spark burst from her body, and I could clearly see the wires all lead to her. This was what Murdoc was hiding. 

Nearly falling backwards, I tripped, catching myself on the desk behind me. Tears formed in my eyes as I noticed her head move slightly, and I immediately dashed towards the door. Slamming it shut, I ran across the beach. My feet hit the hot plastic with every stride, but I ignored the burning feeling as I continued on. A rush of adrenaline kept my pace consistent, and within a few minutes I had run up the wooden steps, making my way to the elevator.

My lungs burned as I slammed my hand on the button to the elevator, panic ever-present in my actions. When the doors finally closed I took a deep breath, trying to process what I had just witnessed. So many perturbing and scary thoughts entered my mind as I felt the elevator begin to move upward towards the house. Fear kept me from falling to the floor of the elevator, scared of what was to come with another girl on the island. 

The sound of a ding rang in my ears as the doors opened, and I ran down the hall quickly. 

"Stuart?" I called out to him, bursting into his room. 

He wasn't there, and I cursed under my breath as I continued through the house calling his name. Finally I came to the laundry room, and before I entered he peeked his head out, and I let out a surprised gasp. 

"What's wrong?" He asked, concern filling his tone. 

"There's a..." I trailed off as I shook my head. 

He didn't say a word, waiting for me to finish as he sat down the basket he held in his hands. 

"There's a girl!" I exclaimed, my voice riddled with fear. "In the light house!" 

"In the where?" 

Murdoc's voice brought a set of icy chills to rush down my back, and I turned to him quickly. He stood in the hallway, opposite to where I had come from. His arms were crossed tightly over his chest, his dark eyes glaring at me intensely. 

"We need to h—"

"I'll let you speak in a minute, love. In the where?" He cut me off with a harsh tone. 

"In... the lighthouse..." I repeated, wincing to myself as I realized what I just had admitted to. 

Murdoc's jaw tensed as the words left my mouth. My gaze moved to the floor as I heard him let off a disapproving grunt. 

"Where I told you not to go?" He asked. 

Opening my mouth to say something in my defense, I quickly shut it as the tension in the room grew. 

"Now's when you're allowed to speak, darling." 

A mixture of irritation and frustration boiled inside of me, still confused on who the girl was. Clearly Murdoc knew exactly who and what I was talking about, and he didn't seem worried in the slightest. 

"Who is she?" I questioned, looking up at him slowly. 

"You didn't answer my question." He retorted, shaking his head. 

"What did you do to her?" 

"First of all, mind your own. It's not your fucking job to get into my business, is it?" He started, taking a few steps in my direction. "Second, you're not asking the questions 'ere, got that?"

Nodding in response, I lowered my eyes to the ground once again as he now towered over me. Tears swelled at my eyes but I fought them back, my body beginning to tremble slightly. 

"Good." Murdoc snapped. "I'll give you a pass this time for leaving the house without telling me, only because this twit told you to. But I don't want you pulling that again, yeah?" 

"Sometimes she needs to have her space—"

"You're not her babysitter, are you? I don't want to hear another word outta you, 2D." Murdoc cut him off quickly, pointing a finger in his direction. 

2D sighed, crossing his arms. Turning my head to glance at him, we made eye contact briefly, and I silently thanked him for defending me. The way his expression went soft, I could tell he knew what I was thinking. 

"Right, now fuck off and make yourselves useful." Murdoc ordered, motioning us to leave. 

With a deep breath I made my way into the laundry room, finishing what 2D had started working on. 

"Juliet." Murdoc called to me, and I looked back at him slowly. "Don't take 2D's job from 'im, find something else to do."

Closing my eyes for a moment to repress my irritation, I nodded in compliance. 

"Yes, sir." I answered, forcing politeness greatly. 

He chuckled at this as I made my way towards him. Our eyes met, and he stopped me before I could walk past where he stood. 

"The bathroom needs a good cleaning," He paused for a moment, "Try your best not to break anything else in there."

With a small frustrated nod and a forced smile, I pushed past him and quickly made my way down the hall. Reaching the bathroom, I made my way inside and shut the door quickly. My nerves were shot, and my body felt tired and weak from running earlier. The image of the girl haunted my thoughts, and couldn't help but wonder who she was. What hurt me most was the fact Murdoc had another girl here, presumably kidnapped as well, but who knew. 2D seemed quiet when I mentioned it, and Murdoc evaded the conversation as a whole. I needed to know who she was.

Shaking the thoughts from my head, I began looking through the cabinets, searching for something to clean with. The bathroom was a mess, the half shattered mirror only making the space more of an eyesore. With a small sigh I opened the medicine cabinet, and my eyes widened as I found more prescription bottles. Grabbing one of them slowly, an idea surfaced in my mind. A horrible idea. Making my decision quickly, I pocketed it.

Surely 2D wouldn't notice one missing bottle.


	10. Chapter 10

The next couple weeks were quiet.

Murdoc had been busy preparing the collaboration songs, and having something to do lately was keeping him from disturbing the peace. 2D wasn't acting very social either, either smoking somewhere in the house or out on the water. It was probably for the best that they needed some space, and I didn't particularly care if they left me alone considering there was a significantly less amount of arguing when everyone was busy. Murdoc had been showing signs of improvement as well, using a gentler tone with me when feeling upset, and even helping me with larger tasks when he was free. 

Although being alone wasn't particularly ideal, I really did try my best to enjoy the quiet time I had—it was refreshing to not be around the boys. The only time we'd all sit down together and conversate was at dinner. Murdoc had been making us all sit at the dining room table to eat our food, which in turn made things awkward as none of us had much to say. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel slightly comforted by it though; eating dinner with our dysfunctional family brought me a small amount of wholeness. 

Tonight was no different.

Before I made dinner, I took another couple pills. While the boys hadn't noticed the few missing bottles in the past month, I was still paranoid they were onto me. The last few weeks had been easier for me, coasting my way through most of the days while I got things done. Everything was going well, and as long as I could keep this up, nothing was going to change. 

Turning off the stove, I took a deep breath through my nose as I finished making the dinner. My mind was hazy, and I stared at the cabinet over the counter for a moment before remembering what exactly I was looking for. Plates. I had to remind myself, opening the cupboard slowly before I grabbed out three. 

The quiet voices of the boys rang softly from the living room, snapping me out of my thoughts. I listened closely as I heard them discussing lyrics on the couch.

"Like factories?" 2D asked, "What the hell does that mean?"

"It's—ah, it's like, well—you wouldn't get it anyway. You just have to sing the bloody thing, I don't know why you're whingeing about my lyrics, mate."

"A song about someone's 'rhinestone eyes' is... a bit romantic for our style, don't ya' think? What's that got to do with factories anyways? You looking to bring back the industrial revolution or something?"

"It's a metaphor, 2D. Like I said before, this album's about the pollution in our oceans and cities, how corporations are convoluted and unjust, running our lives while ruining the bloody environment. The mere concept of Plastic Beach is a metaphor in itself, we've been over this. Ah, just—we'll talk about it later." Murdoc muttered with a sigh, clearly giving up on explaining it to the boy. "Less important matters aside, I'm ordering a shipment for later this week, do you need anything?"

"A gun to shoot myself, preferably." 2D replied in a nonchalant manner. "Especially after doing my head in with all this environmentalist talk."

"Oh, come off it, ya' twat. Juliet!" Murdoc called to me, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Hm?" I hummed.

"Supplies coming this week. Does her Highness need anything?"

"Considering grey water likely runs through the tap, how about some water that's not contaminated with microorganisms and bacteria." I answered sarcastically, rolling my eyes. I added, "A one way ticket to New York City would work too."

To my surprise, he turned to his list and wrote it down.

"Tampons," I heard him mutter, "Diapers'll do, actually... And a pacifier."

"For you or her?" 2D asked.

"Oh, shut it, face-ache. Y'know, you..."

The ringing in my ears replaced their voices as I stared at the food I had made. My vision became blurry as my eyes slowly closed, and I took a deep breath through my nose. Forcing my eyes open, I placed my hand on my head as I felt for signs of a fever. My skin was unusually cold, and confusion fell over me. 

"Juliet!" Murdoc called to me from the living room, quickly bringing me out of my haze.

"Y-yes?" I responded, glancing back at him. 

"How's dinner coming—" His questioning tone quickly turned to one of concern as I saw him now standing in the doorframe, "All right?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm... I'm fine." I slurred, the entire room spinning along with the fog in my head.

I coughed out an inhale as I shambled my way to the fridge, my breath turning to pathetic wheezes. Desperately, I scanned the fridge for water, to no avail.

"Oh, fuck." I leaned against the fridge door for support, nausea swirling in my stomach.

"You're fine, are you?" Murdoc asked as I felt his hand gently rubbing my back, "Get her some water, Stuart. Now."

"I'm gonna puke." I slurred weakly, nearly falling into Murdoc.

"You haven't been drinking, have you? Bloody hell, you're cold. Here."

He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into a gentle hug, rubbing my back in a failed attempt to warm me. Every time I closed my eyes, they begged me to keep them closed. It felt as though the room turned upside down, and all I could do to keep my balance was to keep my eyes shut. Slowly, I felt less response from my body as I no longer had the ability to move. The abyss of unconsciousness had me in its frigid grip as I felt my body hit the kitchen floor.

***

With a shudder, my eyes snapped open.

Looking around at my surroundings, I noticed I was in my apartment. It was cold, and my bare legs began to shake as I folded my arms over my chest with a shiver. Every breath I could manage took an icy form in the air, the chill of the room much like a cold winter's night in New York City.

"Hello?" I called out into the apartment, my voice echoing as if I were in a tunnel. 

There was no response to my call, and a perturbing feeling surfaced inside me. A state of eeriness rose in the space, and the sound of a door opening made me turn quickly on my heel. My eyes met the bathroom door as it swayed open; a small light shone from the inside, illuminating the dark room where I stood. The hairs on my neck stood on end as tears approached my eyes, the fear in my chest climbing up my throat. 

My feet betrayed me as I began to walk towards the door, every step sending an icy shock rushing through my body. Memories of this night played through my head, and I nearly choked as I stopped myself from approaching the door any further. 

"Ren...?" His name left a bitter aftertaste on my tongue. 

No response once again, and with that realization I peered around the corner, into the bathroom. Nothing could prepare me for what I saw. Ren's lifeless body was slumped on the ground, his skin pale as a ghost. The approaching tears I tried so hard to fight back broke through, falling down my face and onto the floor. Panic washed over me as I ran to him, crouching down and pulling his face into my lap. His eyes remained closed as I desperately screamed for him to wake up, my voice echoing a thousand times into the night. 

Nausea rose inside me as I felt the sudden need to throw up, and my feeble attempts to repress the feeling only made it worse. Before I knew it, I had my head hung over the toilet bowl as I began emptying my last meal into it. 

***

Hands wrapped around me from behind as I continued to vomit, my body shaking dramatically. The room seemed to brighten as I opened my eyes a bit, and voices snapped me out of my haze. 

"What the bloody hell happened?" Murdoc's voice echoed from behind me. 

He seemed frustrated, his questioning tone directed at somebody next to him. Before I could bring myself to look, another fit of gagging into the toilet resumed. 

"I-I don't know!" 2D snapped at him, concern present in his tone. "Why are ya' blaming me? I had nothin' to do with it!"

"Just-—shut up! Get the nasal spray from my toilet—the Narcan!" 

"Why do you ha—"

"For you, bellend! Hurry!"

Their voices pierced my ears, a throbbing headache shooting through my forehead. I tried to groan but my body still was unresponsive, and I realized I was unable to move. 

As I opened my eyes, the ring of a toilet greeted me. Holding my weight from behind me must have been Murdoc, his steady breathing calming my nerves slightly. As I finished puking I took a deep inhale, and I could feel his hand rubbing my back steadily. Murdoc's fingers ran through my hair as he pulled it back and out of my face, and I could hear his breathing hitch as I stopped throwing up. 

"You're a goddamn idiot, Jules." I could hear him whimper from behind me, his voice hoarse. 

Murdoc sounded, concerned. It was clear from the tone of his voice he was worried whether or not I was going to be okay, not because of himself this time, but because of my own stupidity. Now he's here, desperately trying to get me to come back, forcing me to puke up the pills I took. His voice sounded broken, like what was happening was somehow his own fault. Murdoc... wanted me alive. 

Desperately I tried to respond, but my eyes were heavy and the words got lost before I could. Before I could lay my heavy head down to sleep, Murdoc already had his fingers in the back of my throat, forcing me to puke once again. 

This time I woke up completely, and I grabbed the side of the bowl with both my hands. After I finished vomiting once again, I was thrown into a coughing fit as I fell back into my captor. A sigh emitted from him, and I was now fully aware of his shaky body beneath me. 2D must have entered the room, Murdoc beginning to move me off of him and onto the floor. 

"Help me lay her down," Murdoc snapped at the boy in a worried tone. "Be careful with 'er!"

"I'm trying!" 

Their yelling only made my splitting headache worse, and I felt my eyes close once again. Gently I was laid down onto the floor on my back, my head resting under Murdoc's hand. After hearing rustling to my right, a tube of some sort was quickly inserted inside my nostril. Before I could make myself wake up again, a fluid dripped down my throat, coating my sinuses thoroughly. 

Several minutes of silence went by before I opened my eyes slowly, a sudden feeling of calmness washing over me. Finally able to move by myself, I took in a deep breath of air. When my eyes finally adjusted my gaze met Murdoc's, who was still leaning over me, holding my head. 

"Murdoc..." My voice was small, barely audible. 

He didn't respond, and his expression quickly changed. Anger could be seen in his eyes, and my body instinctively sat up, drawing away from him. Wincing as I did this, I placed my hand on my head to ease the throbbing I felt between my eyes. 

"Guess I was wrong." Murdoc's voice was stern, riddled with so many emotions it was hard to tell what was real. 

"Huh?" Is all I could manage, pushing my back up against the bathtub. 

There was a moment of silence before he responded. "There's a good half-mile drop off the balcony just outside, and you opted for pills. Can't even do that right, can you?"

Confusion washed over me, and my eyes moved to the floor in embarrassment. Murdoc was oddly calm for someone who thought my overdose on pills was intentional. There wasn't any easy way to try and convince him otherwise, even though I knew it was my fault. I never meant for it to go this far. 

"That's not what's going on..." I whispered, my gaze meeting his once again. 

"You put on a good act, that's for sure." Murdoc bellowed, "So good in fact, I almost fell for it. Everything was fine, this—this was working. Yeah, but you wanted me to think that, right? So you could take a handful of pills to catch me off guard? You really rather be dead—"

"Murdoc, please."

"—than be here?" He ignored my statement as he continued, his hands forming fists. "You think dying is a luxury, do ya'? You're a coward for believing that, really are. Especially with how good you have it 'ere. You get three meals a day and have a place to sleep, a lot of folks don't even have that. You're nothing but a selfish brat. You think you can try and punish me to prove a point?"

"Murdoc." 2D stopped him, placing a hand on his shoulder slowly. "She's had enough."

Murdoc pushed him away, standing to his feet as he grabbed the boy by the collar of his shirt. I let out a gasp as he suddenly threw him against the wall, their faces inches apart as he held him there. 

"Where'd she get the pills from, Stuart?" Murdoc growled in a questioning tone, and 2D cowered from him. 

"I-I told you, I don't know!" 2D stuttered, his voice shaky. 

"I stole them!" I admitted, tears forming at the edge of my eyes. "It's not his fault, Murdoc. I-I've been stealing them, for a couple weeks—"

"You what?" 

It would be impossible to describe the anger I saw in Murdoc's eyes as his gaze met mine, but the feeling that surfaced inside of me was anything but comforting. 

"I never meant for this to happen, I swear." I quickly added, a tear falling down my face. 

Murdoc shook his head as he replied in a sarcastic tone, "You never meant to take the pills you stole?" 

All arguments I had to defend myself slowly slipped my mind as embarrassment fell over me from his reprimand. It really sounded stupid when he put it like that. Before I could say anything, he let out a frustrated groan, running his hands through his hair. 

Murdoc stormed out of the bathroom, pushing past 2D with a shove as he left the two of us alone. The silence of the room was only pierced by the occasional sound of water from the faucet dripping into the sink. 

"You okay, Julie?" 2D asked, rubbing the back of his neck. 

"I'm fine." I answered softly as he walked over to me. 

He only sighed as he stopped where I sat on the floor, and his gaze told me he wasn't convinced with my answer. A sudden wave of fear fell over me as I heard loud banging noises echoing from the hall and more tears fell down my face. 

"Stuart, I swear I didn't mean to—" I cut myself off as I realized the situation I was in. "I could have died... I-I didn't mean to, I just—Murdoc was so hard to be around and I... Murdoc's going to punish me. He's gonna freak out and—"

"Juliet, calm down." 2D soothed, crouching down to place his hand on my shoulder. "Murdoc isn't gonna hurt you, okay? He knows you've been through enough today. I know he seems angry but he was just worried."

"Worried." I mocked, "Count how many cuts and bruises he's given me on one hand. He's not 'worried' about me."

Silence crossed over the two of us for a moment that felt like hours.

"Juliet..." 2D started slowly, "This wasn't a..."

"What?" I asked.

"Like an... attempt, was it?"

"I wouldn't be talking to you if it was."

2D sighed, his eyes moving to the floor, "Well, I'm glad you are. Talking to me, that is. You scared me, you know that? No more sneaking pills. Come on, let's get you to bed."

Nodding in response, I wiped my tears from my face. 2D smiled at me as he held a hand out to help me up. Taking his hand, we both stood to our feet, and I sighed deeply as my head pounded once again. Before starting up another conversation, I made my way to the door, but was stopped by 2D's hand on my wrist. 

"You should lay down—"

"I need some air." I cut him off, pulling my wrist from his grip as I walked out into the hall. 

My mind went a bit hazy as I walked towards the living room, and the sound of distant pounding made me quicken my pace. Feeling around my pockets, I sighed in relief as I realized my lighter and my pack of cigarettes were still on me. The only thing I wanted in this moment was to relieve the building anxiety in my chest. 

As I made my way to the sliding glass door in the living room, I opened it and quickly walked outside. A gust of fresh air ran through my hair, easing the nausea still deep in my stomach. Crossing my arms tightly over my chest, the cold breeze sent a set of chills rushing through me. With shaky hands, I grabbed out my lighter and my pack of cigarettes, placing one between my teeth and lighting it quickly after. 

Taking a deep drag off my cigarette, I began to worry about what Murdoc would do. Both him and 2D were convinced what happened was purposeful, and I knew there wasn't a real way of convincing them otherwise. Surely I wouldn't be let off easy for this. Remembering the last time I was punished sent a pulse of fear through me, and I closed my eyes tightly at the thought. 

"This too, huh?" 

My eyes snapped open at the sound of Murdoc's voice, my breathing halting in my chest. Avoiding his gaze, I looked out at the water and he made his way over to where I stood. He leaned on the railing next to me, watching the waves bellow. 

"You know, that's a nasty habit you're starting." Murdoc added, his tone hard to read. 

"Sure is." I held up the still red scar of a cigarette burn on my wrist. "Don't act like you give a shit."

"You're naive." He stated in a stern voice. "Should I trust you, being this close to the balcony?" 

"You know what? Stop." I retorted, turning to face him. "As strange as it is—being in my current situation—I'm not suicidal, jackass." 

Murdoc eyed me for a moment before he reached into his pocket, pulling out one of 2D's prescription bottles. His gaze moved to what was in his hand and he scoffed. 

"So you downed a bottle of pills because... you're happy?" 

Refusing to argue with him, I turned my attention back to the waves, taking another drag off my cigarette. He sighed deeply, and I could see him shake his head as he watched me. 

"I went through all this effort to bring you here, it would be a shame if something were to happen to you." Murdoc began, looking towards the water with a sigh. "Juliet, I want you here, I really do. You have every right to feel the way you do—I just wish ya' would warn me before you go off your trolley. And I get that this isn't ideal for you, but it's pretty selfish to try and punish me like that instead of just saying something. I'm responsible for ya', kid. I don't need that on my conscience. You ever think how that'd make me feel?"

What a fucking tool.

Without thinking, I turned to him and flicked my lit cigarette towards his face. The ember from the butt stung him on the cheek as he recoiled suddenly, wiping smolders off.

"How do I think it makes you feel? You haven't shown even an ounce of concern for my well being since I got here. You're a bigger threat to my life than any amount of pills, and you want me to consider your feelings? If you think I give two shits about how you—" 

Before I could continue, my breath caught in my throat, bringing on a coughing fit. Murdoc watched me with a look of anger mixed with confusion, tension radiating off him. His expression slowly changed to one of concern as I continued to cough, unable to stop. 

"That cough doesn't sound good, you should—"

I interrupted him by coughing louder, aiming at his face, and he took a few steps back with a loud groan. Finally the fit giving way, I took a deep breath, the cold night air soothing my achy throat. 

"If you're gonna be a child tonight, then I think it's past your bedtime." Murdoc pointed towards the door. "Go to your room."

"And if I don't, what are you gonna do, Murdoc?" I challenged, my voice hoarse. "Tell me, what's my punishment, Mr. Niccals? Are you gonna hit me or drown me this time?"

He raised an eyebrow at my sudden confidence with a nasal chuckle.

"No." He simply said, his jaw tensing.

We sat in silence for a moment before he turned and made his way inside the house. My confidence skyrocketed as he closed the door behind him, a satisfied smirk growing on my face. All of which came tumbling down in an instant as I heard the door lock behind me. The bassist behind the glass shot me a quick wave before disappearing, leaving me stuck in the frigid cold. Making my way to the door, I pulled at the handle but it didn't budge, and I hit the glass in frustration. 

"Fuck you!" I screamed, letting my hand relax onto the glass in defeat. 

***

The next few hours had felt like years. Freezing winds pierced through my clothes, digging into my skin and leaving me with goosebumps. I rubbed my arms desperately to keep blood flowing, but I couldn't escape the cold. My nose continued to run as I felt my throat getting increasingly sore.

Hearing the door slide open caused my head to instantly snap to the noise, pulling myself to my feet from the corner I had huddled in. A head of blue hair peeked out from the doorway to look at me, a confused expression on his face.

"There you are, what—" He started.

"Not. In the mood, 2D." I said with a choked cough, marching into the warm embrace of the house.

"Well... alright." 2D pulled himself back into the house, sliding the door shut behind him.

Without another word I headed down the hall towards my room, frustration boiling over as tears brimmed the edges of my eyes. The warm stuffy air of the house made me feel ill, and it took everything inside me to not collapse right there. 

Murdoc once again found a new way to make my life hell. All hope of getting along with him vanished as my one way of dealing with him was now gone. When I had been throwing up he sounded so concerned, but right when he saw I was conscious his manor had completely changed. He clearly was putting on an act, and it confused me as to why he'd hide his concern from me. If he cared that much, I'd wish he'd show it without trying to gaslight the situation. 

Shaking my head, I tried to erase the idea from my mind. It was frustrating how I wanted him to be nice to me so badly, yet still, I did. Something inside told me I couldn't keep this up for very much longer without completely losing it. This wasn't a fight I was going to win.


	11. Chapter 11

Between my emerging flu symptoms and night terrors, it was no wonder I couldn't get any sleep. 

Considering I had already felt sick before spending hours in the cold the previous night, it was clear now that my body was at its breaking point. Throughout the night I would wake to either a raging fever or the sweaty-cold aftermath of breaking one. At one point in the night I slipped out quietly to the bathroom, only to sit on the floor for an hour, puking into the toilet bowl. By the time the light of the sun began to peek through my window, I was in tears at the realization that I had gotten only around four hours of sleep. 

My eyes finally began to close as I calmed down, but the sound of my door opening ripped the grace of sleep right from under me. 

"What are you still doing in bed?" 

Murdoc's voice filled my body with anger and frustration, and I turned my body from him as I closed my eyes. 

"Shut up." I groaned weakly.

Listening closely, I could hear his footsteps as he made his way to me, and a small tear slowly ran down the side of my face. To my surprise, he sat down on the bed next to me, and I jumped slightly as the back of his fingers rested gently on my cheek. He continued to move them along my neck before connecting his palm to my forehead slowly. 

"You're burning up." He stated, a hint of concern in his voice.

"Wonder why, asshole."

"Oh, bish bosh. You're the one who coughed on me." He said in his fake innocent voice that drove me mad, "You smell like shit, by the way."

"Between an overdose and sleeping in the cold like a fucking dog, I haven't had the luxury to bathe in the last couple days." I responded with a scoff, 

"The smell is enough to put me off my dinner." He mocked, and I rolled my eyes. 

Murdoc watched me as I began to sit up, my arms shaking under my own weight. With a deep breath I pulled my feet to hang off the side of the bed, now sitting next to him. 

"What are you doing?" He questioned, his hands reaching out to help me before he hesitated, freezing just before he touched my arm. 

"Showering." I muttered, pushing his hands away as I stood to my feet. 

Irritation burned in my gut as he stood, following me as I began to slowly walk towards the door. 

"I really don't need—" 

Before I could finish, my legs failed me as I felt my body fall towards the floor. Strong hands caught me before I fell completely over, holding me in place.

"Don't need...?" Murdoc pried, his smug tone somehow continuing to anger me.

Without a word, I looked at him briefly as I restrained the urge to smack the smirk off his face. In defeat, I used Murdoc's arm to keep my balance as we made our way out of the room. 

"You can't keep your balance long enough to shower. I'll get a bath running." He stated, placing his free hand on my back. 

I raised an eyebrow at him in disbelief. "I'm not really keen about being around you and water."

"Oh, come off it." He muttered with a small sigh, rolling his eyes. 

When we approached the bathroom, Murdoc led me inside only to have me lean on the counter as he walked to the bath without a word. Moreso out of curiosity of where he thought this was going, I stood silently and let him go about his business. 

Turning to look into the broken mirror, anxiety pierced my stomach as I saw myself. My blonde hair was a mess, accompanied by dark bags under my green-blue eyes and a scar on my cheek. I looked horrendous. My hair was longer, the line where the light brown color met my dark roots now prominent and noticeable. Bringing my hand to run over my small circular scar, uneasiness washed over me as I realized I was in the same room where I received it.

"Get undressed and put your clothes in a pile, I'll wash them for you." Murdoc said, bizarrely casually.

Embarrassment fell over me as I felt my face flush a bright crimson color; I choked, "Um—what?" 

"Surely you don't need help getting undressed too?" He asked, turning towards me.

"Murdoc, that's not—I'm capable of doing this... by myself." I stammered, gripping my arm with my opposite hand slowly. 

Murdoc turned back towards the water. "Great. Go on then." 

"I will..." I pulled open the door and gestured towards it.

"I'd leave but I prefer if you didn't slip and bump your head on the side of the toilet. It's a liability thing, love." Murdoc stated without moving from where he was crouched. "I'll get one of 2D's fancy towels to cover you up if it bothers you that much."

"Murdoc, can I please have some privacy?"

"You could've, had you not: Smashed my lamp, smashed my mirror, downed a bottle of pills, snooped inside my lighthouse... Shall I go on?" He challenged, standing up and turning towards me. "Come on now, water's getting cold." 

My body froze as I realized he wasn't leaving, and a breath hitched in my throat with anticipation. Slowly I shook my head, taking a step away from him, the back of my leg hitting the countertop behind me. 

"Don't make me undress you, Juliet." Murdoc begged in an irritated tone. "I really don't want to have to do that, I'm sure you understand why."

"Can you at least... not look?"

"Promise you won't smash the mirror again? Still need to get that thing replaced." He gestured toward the mirror.

"Please grow up." I scoffed slightly, rolling my eyes. 

"Says the one who throws tantrums and breaks things." Murdoc mocked with a small grin, crossing his arms as he turned to face the wall. "Last time I did this I had a barmy bird attack me with a shard of mirror. Any sane person wouldn't do this—lucky you're dealing with such a nice bloke like myself."

"I can promise you that you'll have a piece of mirror through your neck this time if you turn around." I warned, and he chuckled at the statement. 

"Hurry up, ya' little prude."

After a few moments of silence, I closed my eyes. My whole body began to tremble uncontrollably as my shaky hands gripped the hem of my oversized shirt slowly. Despite our light banter, the tension in the room was high; and I could feel myself fight back unwanted tears as I brought my shirt above my waist, then up and over my head. The cold air of the bathroom hit my chest, running goosebumps along the delicate skin. Murdoc began to tap his foot impatiently, playing with the chain around his neck in one hand. Letting out a small frustrated groan, I eyed him as I pulled off my undergarments, quickly covering my exposed areas with my arms. 

Before Murdoc could catch a glimpse of me, I made my way to the bath as quickly as possible, getting in and closing the curtain. 

"See? Look at that, you can trust me." 

"Yeah, you're one of the good ones, aren't you?" I responded, my voice riddled with sarcasm. "My Romeo." 

"How long ya' have that one saved, Morrinson?" Murdoc mocked from the other side of the curtain. 

"Never thought I'd get to use it on you." I responded, grabbing a bar of soap off the ledge of the tub. "Never wanted to, at least." 

"Bollocks. Absolutely full of it, you." He laughed, shuffling a bit around the bathroom. 

"You know, you could be a little nicer, Niccals." I muttered with a sigh as I began to wash my body. 

He didn't respond to this, silence filling the room once again. With a grunt I heard him sit on the floor, and as I turned off the faucet, all that could be heard was the occasional splash of water as I cleaned myself. 

"I like you, Juliet. I hope you know that." Murdoc said in a low voice. 

Slowly I stopped what I was doing, and my head hung low as I processed what he said. The statement brought a strange feeling surfacing inside me, one I wish it didn't. 

"What am I supposed to say to that, Murdoc?" I forced awkwardly, rubbing my arm. "I don't... What makes you think I feel the same way? I haven't even considered a romantic relationship between us—"

"Bloody hell, don't flatter yourself too much, I didn't mean it like that." Murdoc corrected me with a small scoff. "What I meant was, I don't hate you, Juliet. I know that it seems like I do sometimes."

"So you locked me outside because you like me? You hit me because you like me? How am I supposed to believe that?" I responded quickly, my voice stern. "You've done nothing to prove that you like me, so why should I just accept what you're saying?"

Murdoc stayed quiet for a moment before replying. 

"Things have been pretty tense since you got here." He stumbled over his words, "I know I haven't been the nicest, and you have every right to believe I'm lying. It's just—I never wanted you to be scared of me. In fact, I want you to like me, to get along—"

"Don't do that." I interrupted him quickly.

"Do what?" He asked, the innocence in his tone frustrating me.

"Don't try to gaslight me, Murdoc. That's not what you want." I answered in a small voice, a newfound set of feelings washing over me. "You want me to obey you, it's an inconvenience when I don't. This whole "getting along" idea sounds like a ploy to get me right where you want me."

"Juliet, I want respect."

"I want to be able to sleep at night without worrying about you coming back, drunk out of your mind, trying to force yourself on me again." My voice was hoarse, and my fingers trembled in anticipation. "You want me to respect you, then give me a reason to. All you've done is make me feel helpless and afraid. You act surprised when I fight back but you took everything from me, so it's not like I have much else to lose." 

The eerie silence filled the room once again, bringing anxiety to pierce my stomach. 

"What can I do to fix that, kid?" I could hear the hurt in his voice as he spoke. 

Fighting back tears, I sighed. "I don't know, Murdoc."

"How about we start over?" Murdoc asked in a genuine tone. Letting off a small chuckle, he added, "We can pretend we don't know each other, yeah—do a little roleplay, like what stingy couples do instead of paying for marriage counseling." 

His joke fell flat as the room went silent again. Part of me wanted to laugh and play along, but my doubts held an iron grip around my heart, derailing my train of thought. 

"That'd be convenient." I nearly whispered, my voice tiny and quiet, "For you to just sweep it all under the rug, like it didn't happen."

"That's not what I meant." He corrected me, "I mean actually start over. I don't want you to be scared of me, love. I want to treat you how you deserve to be treated."

"How I deserve to be treated? Let me guess, like a dog?" I tried to exhale a small chuckle, but nothing came out. "Do I get to drink water out of a bowl on the floor n—"

"No." Murdoc simply replied, his voice rid of any sarcasm as he cut me off. He cleared his throat, "Treated with love, compassion... You know what I mean, kid."

My eyes widened at the statement as I fell silent, my breathing coming to a stop in my throat. A strange feeling of anticipation fell over me, sending a pulse of electricity through my veins. The tone of his voice told me he was being serious, but I still had a hard time believing what he said. Despite my doubts, deep down inside, I wanted what he said to be true. 

"You know what, fuck it, why not?" I sighed, shaking my head. "Sure. We'll 'start over' then."

A small chuckle emitted from the bassist as I continued to clean myself, the water now murky with soap. A smile formed on my face but quickly faded as the room went silent once again. Suddenly a sigh could be heard from the other side of the curtain, and the mood in the room shifted to one more serious. 

"I guess if we are starting over I should apologize." Murdoc was quiet as he continued, "The night I came into your room. I-I don't know what came over me—in my own convoluted and fucked up way, I thought that was something you wanted—"

"Strike one." I cut him off, trying my best to keep calm. "Don't lie to me, Niccals."

The tension in the room grew, and his silence left me feeling uneasy. Shaking my head, I laid back into the water, rinsing my head slowly. As I finished, I could hear Murdoc messing with something in his hands. 

"It was what I wanted." He admitted finally, his voice strained as if it were a hard thing to say. "I thought if I was more upfront, you'd just—I don't know..."

"I'd just what, Murdoc? Let it happen?" I asked innocently, trying to follow his mental gymnastics. "You know I didn't like you, right?"

"Didn't...?" He repeated, and I held my tongue. Before I could say anything, he continued. "Ah, Jules, if we were to get along, that'd be just smashing, wouldn't it? I mean, I want ya' to like me, I really do. When I saw how upset you were that night, I got angry. Not at you, but at myself. I never should have tried to force that on ya', or take out my aggression on you afterward—and I especially shouldn't have lied about not remembering. Bloody hell, I messed up bad. I've been messing up bad, ever since I got ya' here. I'm sorry, Juliet. I mean that. I never meant it to get this bad, you deserve better."

As much as I wanted to cut him off and say: Save it. I simply couldn't. Something about his tone, and his words, they left me with a strange new feeling. For the first time in a long time, I felt safe.

Against my better judgement, I laid my back against the far end of the tub, peeking past the curtains at Murdoc who was against the wall. Observing him, I noticed he was sitting on the floor, low enough to where we were face to face. His back was to the wall with one of his knees bent, one of his arms resting comfortably on it. His other hand played with the inverted cross that hung from his neck, his eyes closed. 

For the first time since being on the island, I didn't see Murdoc as a threat. Seeing him in this new light flashed the idea of us getting along in my mind, nervousness aching through my whole body at the thought. Yet, it wasn't anxiety, it was the feeling of clenched anticipation; what someone feels when they have a desire, a need for something. This was a familiar feeling, the same I felt for Ren when I met him all those years ago. 

Before today I would have dismissed these feelings as a mere fantasy, but after the sincerity of his words and his apology, part of me wanted to explore these ideas in my mind further. Shaking away the thoughts, I snapped out of my daydream as I watched Murdoc closely. 

Letting out a feeble cough, I tried to get his attention. When he didn't look in my direction, I reached out my hand, pulling his chin so he was facing me. When our eyes met, I felt an electricity spark between us. My mind went fuzzy as I looked into his brown and red irises, only proving further that what I was starting to feel was real. Bringing my arm back to the edge of the bath, I leaned my chin on it slowly, looking towards the tiled floor below. 

"I forgive you, Murdoc." I whispered, our gazes meeting again. 

I could almost see the corners of his mouth form a smile as he watched me in awe, his eyes wandering my shoulders in curiosity. Murdoc's tongue rolled over his bottom lip slowly, and a jolt of electricity shot through my body as goosebumps covered my arms. 

"You bump your head in there?" He asked dumbfounded, breaking the silence. 

With a small chuckle, I reached my hand out again, this time placing it gently on his shoulder. 

"I need you to do something for me." I cooed, bringing my finger to run down the side of his arm slowly. 

"Anything." His eyes were full of anticipation. 

"Could you get me a towel?" I asked innocently, and he snapped out of his haze. 

"Oh—uh, right." Is all he said before I closed the curtain, smiling to myself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No one probably reads this anymore, but I just want to say, I hate myself and I wish I could just end it right here and now, but I can’t. I’m forced to live with my own regrets and issues and my ADHD and Aspergers and OCD. No one has to remind me of the terrible person I am, I remind myself everyday. I’m truly sorry for the way I have treated this fandom, I try and commission artists and show my support for people in the community, but I so blindly hurt people with this story while trying to selfishly vent my own toxic relationship and abuse I endured. Who knows if I’ll ever finish this story, I was never able to before, I doubt I ever will. I’m so sorry. I fucking hate myself so much, I wish I could just fucking die.


	12. Chapter 12

The next few days were quiet as I got over my sickness.

Murdoc and I had been doing better, making progress, and that's more than I could have hoped for. He had been a huge help in my recovery, not only did he lighten up, but he offered to make meals and take care of me while I was sick. It was hard to tell where any of this was going or how long it would last, but I didn't mind the change in attitude from the bassist.

Feeling better, I decided to get up at a decent hour. Making my way down the hall, I adjusted the large shirt I was wearing, making sure it was pulled down all the way to my knees. My bare feet met the cold hardwood floor as I entered the living room, my attention moving to 2D who was sitting on the couch with a keyboard on his lap.

"Hey, short-stack." I greeted him, walking over and sitting down next to the blue haired boy.

Looking up at me, he titled his head slightly.

"I'm probably the tallest person ya' know." He simply replied, his black sclera meeting my gaze.

With a smile, I leaned in close to him, cupping my mouth to his ear.

"That's the joke." I whispered.

Shooting me a toothless grin, he shook his head. Before replying, he looked back down at the keyboard in his lap, playing a few notes.

"I like it." He chuckled lightly, his leg beginning to shake from where he sat.

Leaning back on the couch, I listened to him play some more notes, closing my eyes as the melody rang through the room. From what I could tell, the song was clearly a work in progress, but still had an odd beauty to it.

These moments of peace, although more common in the recent days, still felt rare; as if they should be cherished and appreciated. Hearing the almost euphoric sound of a piano filled the room with a deep serenity, and although such a small thing, it still comforted me immensely. If only it could always be like this.

The very thought made me recall what had happened in the bathroom only a few nights prior. Images of the conversation played through my mind, and I could feel the corners of my mouth form a smile. Thinking about him made me feel queasy and weak, the anticipation of seeing him building in my stomach once again. Murdoc, his eyes, his words, and the way they all made me feel was almost too much to process. Deep down inside I knew it wasn't right, swooning over such a man, but it felt a lot better than the anticipation of being yelled at or hit every second of the day—

"I'm glad you're feeling better."

2D's voice ripped me from my thoughts, and I opened my eyes to glance around him. Turning to look at me, he shot me a small smile before setting his keyboard onto the ottoman in front of him. Taking a deep breath, he leaned back on the couch, resting his head back so that he was looking towards the ceiling.

"What's got you so happy?" 2D asked, slowly looking at me with a grin.

"What?" I responded awkwardly, letting off a small laugh.

Rolling his eyes, 2D scoffed, "You're a bad liar, Julie. What did you do?"

"I didn't—I didn't do anything, I just..." Struggling to find the right words, my voice faded off.

"Just?" He persuaded, twirling his finger in the air in anticipation.

"I guess I found a way to tolerate Murdoc." I simply replied, chuckling lightly.

"Tolerate?"

"Like—Well, I found a way to get him off my back," I explained, "and I'd say it's working out."

"Well I'm proud of ya'." 2D congratulated, and my smile slowly faded as he continued. "Unlike you, I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut when he talks. Keep whatever is it up and you'll eventually never have to see him again."

Without a response, I turned from him, a strange feeling of disappointment washing over me. Never had I considered the outcome of all of this. In a realistic environment, Murdoc and I would never work out. There was so much wrong with the situation, and the fact I was even considering a relationship with the man sent an alarming pulse of guilt through me.

"You okay?" 2D asked, a hint of concern in his voice.

"I'm fine." I answered, sick to my stomach at the thought.

Before I could say anything else, footsteps could be heard from down the hall, and I shut my mouth quickly as Murdoc entered the room. He was wearing a white captain's hat, a pair of grey slacks, and a loose fitting button down with a wife beater tank peeking underneath. His attention fixed on the outside, he walked past us without an acknowledgment of any kind, and I observed him closely. Spyglass in hand, he made his way to the sliding glass door, his gaze on something outside. Without a word, he opened the door, walking out onto the patio.

My eyes followed him as he approached the railing, extending his spyglass as he looked out on water. Curiosity got the best of me as I stood from where I was, following him outside quietly.

"Between your getup and the telescope, you would have made a fine pirate." I said with a hint of sarcasm, and Murdoc turned to me with a small scoff.

"Are you taking the piss?" He asked in a mocking tone, a feigned look of hurt plastered across his face.

"Maybe." I smiled, making my way to him.

"Cheeky." He responded, turning back towards the water with a deep breath. "Look at this day, bloody beautiful."

As I reached the railing, I leaned on it, taking in the view of the beach below.

"You can't trust the weather out here." I chuckled slightly, "One minute it's sunny and the next it's pouring rain."

Murdoc didn't respond to this, but I could hear him sigh quietly as we watched the waves. My attention turned to him as he looked down at me, our gazes meeting, making my face flare up from embarrassment.

"What?" I laughed awkwardly, my eyes darting from my hands and back to him.

"I didn't say anything, lass." He simply stated, eyeing me with suspicion. "I've never seen you so... giddy."

Quickly turning away from him I rolled my eyes again, "Sorry, am I not allowed to smile?"

"Now I never said that, did I?" Murdoc grinned slightly, his eyes full of thought. He looked through his spyglass before replying. "Ah would ya' look at that? Right on schedule."

"What?" I asked, looking up at him.

He shot me a grin, handing me the spyglass and pointing out on the water. I peered through the lens steadily, trying to line up with what he was motioning to. After a few moments a ship came into view, it wasn't a large ship, but certainly big enough to hold a few passengers and cargo.

"Looks like the groceries are here." Murdoc started as I handed him back his telescope. "Not more than ten minutes out, I'd say."

"How often do they show up?" I asked out of curiosity, and Murdoc shook his head.

"Don't get excited, kid. They aren't being paid to take anything back with 'em." He mocked slightly, and I rolled my eyes.

"That's not what I meant..." I muttered, crossing my arms.

Murdoc adjusted his posture before mirroring me, his deep stare bringing chills rushing down my back. Our eyes met slowly, and my face turned a crimson color once again as his tongue rolled over his bottom lip.

"Hm, maybe not." He said quietly, his brows furrowing slightly. "Be good and stay here while 2D and I go meet them at the dock. We'll be back shortly to start bringing up the shipment, you can help put everything away when we get back."

"Aye aye, captain." I mocked and I could see the edges of his mouth form a small smile.

Leaning towards me slightly, he glided the back of his hand across my cheek in a playful way, a smirk gliding its way across his face.

"Don't miss me too much." He teased in a low voice, and I rolled my eyes.

"Wasn't planning on it." I retorted, pushing his hand from my face and he laughed. "Don't get cocky."

"Me? Cocky? That can't be right." He said as he began to walk towards the house.

Chuckling lightly to myself, I followed quickly after him when he opened the door, pocketing the spyglass that was still in my hand. We walked into the living room, and Murdoc started towards the hallway, motioning for 2D to follow him. 2D shot me a confused look, his eyebrow raising as I stopped near the couch. For a moment I thought I could see a look of envy in his expression, but when I blinked his attention was on the bassist.

Tapping his foot on the ground, Murdoc cleared his throat, his gaze on 2D.

"They're almost here, ya' ready?" He asked him, and 2D stood from where he was sitting on the couch quickly.

"Been waiting on you to be ready." 2D replied, "Ya' always take forever to get ready when your bell-boy-boyfriend shows up with groceries."

"Right, cheeky chops, come off it." Murdoc groaned, rolling his eyes. "Just do as you're told, twit."

As 2D made his way towards the hall with Murdoc, he stopped before he walked out of the room, motioning back to me.

"What about Julie?" He asked him. "We could use the extra hands."

Murdoc shook his head, his expression hard to read as he looked at the boy.

"Our Highness is going to watch the castle while we're gone. Isn't that right?" Murdoc looked back at me with a small wink and I rolled my eyes once again.

2D didn't notice this, and I could hear Murdoc chuckle as the two of them disappeared down the hallway. Taking a deep breath, I sat down at the end of the couch slowly. A few moments later, the floor began to shake with the sound of the elevator turning on, and my eyes closed for a moment as I took a deep breath. As they opened, I turned my attention to the balcony door.

The warm air wrapped around me as I stepped outside. As I reached for my pack of cigarettes in my pocket, I felt Murdoc's spyglass still in my pocket. It was a very fine and regal telescope as it sat folded up in my hand.

"Pirate ship and a spyglass—and that cute little outfit earlier. He's got some fetish for the 19th century." I mocked under my breath.

I unfolded the spyglass and put it up to my eye, looking out at the beach as the two boys walked towards the incoming ship. 2D appeared to look down at Murdoc and say something, and in response, the bassist pushed him to one side, knocking 2D off balance. I chuckled quietly to myself and took a look at the small cargo ship approaching the dock.

"Huh. Kinda see the appeal, this is cool." I continued talking to myself. "Might as well complete the costume."

Grabbing the pack of cigarettes from my pocket, I pulled one out as I sat the spyglass down on the railing carefully. Quickly lighting the end of it after placing it between my teeth, I took a deep breath as I watched the boys disappear onto the ship. My brows furrowed as I waited for them to come back out, the smoke from my cigarette dissipating into the air.

After a few minutes they reappeared, and as I went to grab the spyglass, I nearly pushed it off the railing. Quickly catching it, I took a deep breath as I closed my eyes in relief, but they quickly snapped open as I heard Murdoc yelling from the shore. Most of his echoes were lost to distance, but one word prevailed:

“Twat!”

Extending the spyglass I could see him standing next to a dolley full of crates, his attention on me as he crossed his arms. I couldn't make out what he said, but it still made me roll my eyes. Without thinking, I raised my middle finger towards him, and simultaneously he did the same thing, catching me off guard. Both of us began to laugh as we stood there, flipping each other off.

Lowering my hand, I took a final drag off my cigarette. After putting the butt out and closing the spyglass carefully, I made my way inside to wait for the boys to return.

***

"Juliet!"

My head immediately snapped towards the hallway where I could hear Murdoc calling for me. Before replying, I stood from where I was sitting on the couch, quickly making my way out of the living room and down the hall.

"Yes?" I answered, approaching the elevator where the two boys were.

"Would you be a dear and help with the third dolley, love?" Murdoc asked, pulling a heavy looking load of crates from the elevator.

With a simple nod, I let the two of them pass me before making my way into the elevator to roll out the last crates. Taking a deep breath I mustered up the strength to pull the dolley out of the elevator and started down the hall towards the kitchen.

Stuart and Murdoc were already starting to unload the crates onto the dining room table, and I placed my dolley besides their's as I watched them with curiosity.

"Dammit. I'm gonna have to bring some of this stuff down to the basement." Murdoc sighed, looking around at all the crates slowly.

"You always order more than we need." 2D rolled his eyes slightly as he made his way to the fridge with a few cold items in hand.

"You're lucky I feed you in the first place." Murdoc snapped, pulling out a glass bottle from the box he was going through. "Would ya' look at that."

He turned towards me, bottle in hand, as a smirk glided it's way across his face. Without a word, he handed me the bottle. Taking a closer look before taking it from him, I could clearly see it was water, and my gaze met his in confusion.

"Is that fresh enough for you, Ms. Morrinson?" Murdoc played, and I scoffed slightly as I took it from him.

"My hero." The sarcasm in my voice was purposely evident. I handed him his spyglass in return. "Here."

"I saw you almost drop this off the balcony." He reminded me, and I chuckled. "Thank you for not breaking another one of my things."

"Consider it my gift to you."

"Speaking of gifts, I got some stuff for ya', kid." Murdoc cooed, and I shot him another confused look. "Don't look so surprised, princess. You want to see?"

"Sure, if we agree to stop using pet names—you might be old enough to be my dad, but you don't have to call me kid."

Murdoc responded with a dismissive wave, and I watched as he began to dig through the crates. My eyes wandered to his hands as they pulled a couple items out, something oddly comforting about the sight of them. A breath caught in my throat in surprise as he grabbed what looked like a bag of clothes and a scanty box, my curiosity getting the best of me. Murdoc stood up before bringing the items to me, his expression hard to read.

He first handed me the bag, holding it out for me to take. Eyeing it suspiciously, I shot him another confused glance before taking it from him slowly.

"I thought you were probably tired of wearing that ol' thing." Murdoc explained, pointing to the oversized white tee I was wearing.

Surprised by what he said, I looked through the bag to see it was full of clothes, and I gasped in shock. There weren't words to describe how surprised I was by his generosity, and I struggled to say anything as I stared into the bag. 

"I don't know what to say." I murmured, looking up at him.

The corners of his mouth formed a small smile as he watched me closely. Before I could say anything else he handed me the small box in his hand, an eager look in his eyes.

"This too."

Gently I took the box from him, my fingers running over the grooves slowly. With a deep breath I sat down the bag of clothes, slowly opening the box. With further inspection, I realized the box contained a kalimba. A small smile formed on my face as it invoked memories of my mother, how sweetly she would play her hand piano to me before bed, her soft voice echoing sweet melodies through my room. I could remember her soft and kind eyes watching me as I struggled to learn the notes.

Although it brought me wonderful memories, it also reminded me of my mother, and what happened to her. Tears brimmed the corners of my eyes as my heart sank in my chest. Murdoc took notice to this, setting down what he had in his hands and making his way to me.

"Hey, hey. What's wrong, love?" He soothed, placing his hand on my back comfortingly.

Shaking my head, I suppressed a sob, covering my mouth with my hand.

"It's nothing, really." I tried to convince him, a tear falling down my face. "Thank you, Murdoc."

Without a reply, he wrapped his arms around me, holding the back of my head with a sigh. Keeping myself quiet, I closed my eyes as my head rested on his chest. The comfort of the moment brought a peaceful feeling to fall over me, and I took a deep breath, taking in the smell of Murdoc's sweater. Pulling away from me, his gaze met mine as he looked deeply into my eyes. The expression on his face was hard to read, but for a moment I thought I saw a concerned look etched there.

"You don't have to explain." He whispered, leaning down and planting a gentle kiss on my forehead. "I'm gonna bring this stuff down to the basement, I'll be back up to help put the rest of the things away. Take your time."

My eyes stayed on him as his hand left my face, and he made his way out of the room slowly. I couldn't comprehend what had just happened, and I stood silent for a few moments as I processed it. A cough from behind me snapped me out of my thoughts, and I turned to see a very confused 2D staring at me.

"What?" I asked softly, wiping my face with my hand.

His eyebrow raised as he watched me, and his arms folded slowly across his chest. The tension in the room rose as we stood there in silence.

"What, 2D?" I asked again, rubbing my arm awkwardly.

"Nothing." He replied simply, turning back to the groceries which he started putting away. "You n' Murdoc seem to be getting along."

"Yeah, I guess."

"Is that what you meant?" 2D asked, looking at me with an unwelcoming expression. "When you said you found a way to 'tolerate' Murdoc?"

"What are you talking about, Stuart?" I scoffed slightly, turning towards him with my hand on my hip.

"Not that kinda girl, huh?"

The statement felt like nails on a chalkboard, bringing frustration to boil inside me.

"Cut it out, Stuart. Don't assume things about a situation you don't know anything about." I snapped defensively, turning my face from him.

"I'd put money on me knowing more about this than you."

That caught my interest again as I turned back to him, "How so?"

"Listen, I've said it before, you're smart. I don't need to spell it out for ya'—the gifts, the compassion, anything he's said; it's all a load of shite." He gestured gradually with his hands as he grew his case.

"What if _you're_ full of shit?" I retorted, grasping at the little defense I had left.

"So you trust the one that brought ya' here, battered you around, gave ya' that scar on your cheek," he pointed at my face, "And now wants to play nice when you don't like him?"

"I've never liked him."

"Could've fooled me." 2D said conclusively, instantly closing my mouth for me. "Hell, could've fooled him."

Silence filled the room like a blanket of fog, filling my lungs and weighing them down, preventing me from drawing breath. Even after my defeat, he continued.

"Come on, Juliet, use your brain."

At a loss for words, my breath caught in my throat. I found myself looking down at my shoes for anything to retort, finding nothing but my nervous, fidgeting hands.

"Ah." 2D's words pierced the silence like a hot knife, "I see."

By the time I had mustered the courage to look him in the eyes again, he had turned and left, leaving me alone in the now empty kitchen. I looked back up at the boxes of unloaded grocery around the room, realizing that it was now up to me to put them away.

"Asshole." I muttered under my breath.

***

After finishing up for the night, I took a deep breath as I looked towards the clock on the wall. It read 7:32 PM, despite it feeling much later. I spent the rest of my day organizing the kitchen after Murdoc had helped me put everything away, and I was feeling more tired than usual.

Making my way out of the kitchen I began to walk down the hall, stopping at the entrance of the living room as I noticed Murdoc sitting on the couch. His back was to me, but I could tell he was reading. Curiosity got the best of me as I walked over to him, circling the couch so that I could observe what he was doing. As I did this, his eyes lifted from the page, and he took a long drag off of his pipe. Our gazes met for a moment before he exhaled a cloud of smoke into the air, his attention returning to his book.

"Can I help you?" Murdoc asked in a low voice, and I quickly shook my head.

"No I—uh, just finished cleaning." I responded awkwardly, my eyes darting around the room.

"Good girl." He simply replied, turning the page in his book.

My attention turned to the record player in the corner of the room and the bookshelf full of vinyls. Curiously I made my way to it, and began looking through the music slowly. Murdoc cleared his throat from behind me.

"You finished early, you're clearly exhausted, yet you choose to linger in the living room—even despite having the option to go to bed." Murdoc said in a suspicious tone, and I looked back at him with a shrug.

"Am I not allowed to linger in the living room?"

"Again, never said that, just making an observation, love." He retorted, still looking towards his book. "Almost feels like ya' want to hang out with me."

"Keep dreaming." I mocked, returning my attention to the bookshelf.

My hands moved over the vinyls as I read the covers, and I could hear Murdoc tsk at me from behind. There were endless amounts of rock albums, many I had never heard of; Twisted Sister, Ratt, Poison, Cinderella, Tygers of Pan Tang. The names had to have been made up by folks with way too much accessibility to drugs and/or alcohol. I was already towards the end of the row before I found a vinyl I recognized and had owned myself growing up, and I pulled it from the shelf slowly.

"The Platters?" I chuckled, turning back towards Murdoc. "How old are you?"

"Forty-two this year," Murdoc rolled his eyes. "I was born in sixty-six, okay? They were before my time, 'round the fifties."

"It's just very unlike you, wouldn't have expected to find this." I murmured, placing the vinyl back where I had found it. "Forty-two, huh? Isn't a twenty-four year old a little young for you?"

As I continued to flip through the vinyls, I could hear Murdoc grumble something from behind me, but I was too focused to make out what he had said. Letting out a small gasp of excitement, I pulled out one that caught my eye, looking at the cover closely.

"Pampered Menial, by Pavlov's Dog? On vinyl?" My mouth dropped at the sight. "And it's in such good condition..."

"Be careful with those, yeah?" Murdoc called to me and I shook my head, making my way to the record player.

Without another word, I placed the vinyl on the turntable and set the arm on it gently, making sure to play the second track. 'Late November' immediately started playing, and I closed my eyes as I listened pensively. The music flooded the room, the happy melody filling me with an odd melancholy feeling.

Slowly, I turned to Murdoc, shooting him a small grin. He looked up from his book briefly, eyeing me with suspicion. For a moment he looked almost embarrassed by the music, and I could see him gulp slightly as he stared towards the record player. Slowly I began to sway as I walked towards him, reaching out my hand to him. He rolled his eyes, shaking his head as he looked back towards his book.

"C'mon, Niccals." I cooed as I placed my finger on his book, pulling it down slowly.

He groaned, "I don't dance, Juliet."

"Let me have this, just once."

"It's flattering, really; this little crush you've developed for me, Ms. Morrinson."

It was my turn to roll my eyes, "Nevermind, asshole."

Straightening my posture, I placed my hands on my hips in irritation. The smallest hint of a smirk formed on his face as he watched me, his tongue slowly rolling over his bottom lip.

"Don't start." I begged, pinching the bridge of my nose.

Suddenly he stood, setting down his book on the couch. Now towering over me, his eyes met mine as a smile snaked its way across his face. I tried my best to ignore this, turning my face from him with a scoff. Gently grabbing my chin, he pulled me back to face him. Our eyes met, and I felt my cheeks flush a deep crimson color instinctively. For the first time I didn't disregard or evade his intrusive advances, my curiosity getting the best of me as a new feeling set my heart aflame.

"Not even denying it?" He asked with a raise of his eyebrow.

That damn voice.

"I don't have a 'crush' on you, Murdoc."

"Bollocks." He played, grabbing one of my hands in his. "You're as lovesick as a schoolgirl. It's adorable, lass."

"You're really crazy, you know?"

"And you're coy," He paused, pulling me to the middle of the room. "Asking ol' Murdoc to dance, it's cute."

Watching him closely, he walked to the record player, adjusting the arm gently before turning back towards me. 'Julia' began to play and I simultaneously felt my face flush as I looked away from him. Before I could say anything, he pulled me close to him, one hand on my waist and the other holding up my hand. Rolling my eyes once again, I placed my hand on his arm gently. The feeling of his bicep under my fingertips left a strange sensation running through me, my breath catching in my throat.

To my surprise, he held me close, lowering his head to rest on mine. Without thinking about it, I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath of air as I rested my head on his chest, listening to the music.

_Julia, you've set the standards for me_

_Walk to your door_

_Beggin' for it just to be more_

The lyrics made my face flush up, the choice of song causing my head to spin with questions. Trying to avoid an air of awkwardness, I spoke up.

"This is stupid." I chuckled a bit as we swayed gently back and forth.

"It was your idea." He reminded me, the smirk ever-present on his face. "You haven't forgotten that I'm the antagonist of your little story, have you?"

"My story already has an antagonist, get in line, old man." I challenged, looking up at him, and he laughed. "And this may have been my idea but you agreed to it."

"Easy now, daddy issues... It seems like I've met my match when it comes to charming others." He paused, "I mean, it's more fun to think of you as some elaborate con artist whose mind-tricked me into this, though. Lingering in the living room, pretending to be my friend just to ask for a dance..."

_Julia, oh you're drivin' me crazy_

_But I'm... I'm a part of your plans_

_Oh just a man while your dreams be_

_You're just a part of me_

_Oh please see how much, how much you mean to me_

_Please see how much, how much you mean to me_

_Julia_

"Pulling the victim card isn't really within your prerogative."

"Cold." Murdoc cringed, his face riddled with sarcasm. "Witty and playful banter? You're clearly on the pull tonight—trying to get into my knickers, love? You could just ask politely and we can skip the dinner date. Making me all randy just thinking about it. We could even get 2D in on it, I'm sure you'd fancy that, hm?"

"Gross." I scoffed, "You wish, Niccals."

"Tell me I'm wrong about your little crush you conjured up for the mean British man, Mary Sue, then I'll stop." He cooed, lowering his face to mine as his grip on my waist became firm, whispering, "Something tells me I'm not wrong though, am I? I'm barely touching you and your whole body is trembling..."

Our faces were inches apart, our bodies pressed up against each other; to say there was electricity between us would be an understatement. The strings of my heart pulled with each second he held me in his arms, the music seeming to drown out the world around us.

_And Julia, straight away you've had me_

_And I know I've had you_

_You're a part of me too_

_And I can't live without your love_

_And I can't live without your love_

_Well I can't live without you_

_Julia_

Closing my eyes, I leaned into him, pressing my lips to his gently. He forced back a smile as he kissed me in return, moving his lips with mine in rhythm. There was not a single air of awkwardness between us as we embraced each other. One of his hands moved to my lower back, pulling me even closer to him as his other moved to gently caress the nape of my neck. To my surprise, he was gentle; not a single drop of lust radiated from the bassist. My heart only began to flutter further at the realization that he might feel the same electricity in me that I felt in him. Never had I felt anything this strong, not since I met Ren. Falling this hard over a man who hurt me so much... I really had gone mad.

_And I can't live without your love_

_And I can't live without your love_

_Well I can't live without you_

_Julia_

Without thinking, my tongue found its way into his mouth, and he slowly broke his lips from mine. My eyes opened, taking a deep breath as his gaze met mine, our faces still inches from each other's as the song ended as abruptly as our kiss.

“Slow down, lass.” Murdoc warned, “Keep that up and I just might actually think you like me.” 

“Think whatever you want, it doesn’t mean anything.” I said in a quiet voice, looking down at where our bodies touched. 

“I’m no expert, but I’d say you have a few screws loose, love.” 

“Means a lot coming from you.” I rolled my eyes, “Sure, I’m the crazy one, Mr. Satanist.”

Murdoc smirked, pressing his forehead to mine, "And you would kiss this barmy old man?"

"Don't let that get to your head."

"Too late."

"Great." I sighed, "Just what you need."

Murdoc let off a laugh, "The hell does that mean?"

"Last thing you need is an ego boost to accompany your god-complex." I joked, stretching my arms a bit, wrapping them around his neck and allowing my hands to gently run through his hair.

"You would deny me your romantic feelings because you think I have an ego?" He shook his head dramatically. "Now that's cold hearted."

The last thing I wanted was to be honest about how I was feeling, so I decided to avert from his suspicion with a chuckle.

"It's just a kiss, Murdoc." My hands moved to his chest awkwardly. "Doesn't mean anything."

Raising his eyebrow, he flashed a grin at me again.

"Whatever you say, Jules." He mocked a bit before planting a soft kiss on my forehead. "That one didn't mean anything either."

With that, he let go of me and walked to the couch, grabbing his book with a small huff. Crossing my arms, I eyed him as he folded the page he was on. Looking at the clock on the wall, he chuckled with a mischievous look in his eyes.

"Now if you'll excuse me," he started, turning towards me before continuing. "You've gotten me hot and bothered from all this banter and sexual tension, so I think I'll call it a night."

"Seems a bit early for you." I questioned, slowly raising my eyebrow at him.

Murdoc licked his bottom lip, making his way to me slowly. He scoffed as he brought his hand to my chin, lifting my face to his.

"Goodnight, Juliet." He cooed, planting a soft kiss on my lips before pulling away and walking towards the hall. "I'm gonna go have a wank—I'll think of you."

" _Murdoc_." I cringed, rolling my eyes as I watched him leave.

"You're welcome to join." His voice echoed down the hallway, getting softer as he made his way to his room.

For a split second I actually considered his offer, but I quickly found myself repulsed at the thought. What I felt was attraction, not love. Damn that man for making me question myself. Deep down I was happy with the way things were going, and I didn't want it to go back to the way they used to be; but part of me questioned the reality of the situation. It was hard for me to tell what was real and what wasn't, and where I would be left at the end of it.

2D came to mind, his words from earlier echoing through my head. As much as I wanted to brush our conversation off and act like it didn't happen, I just couldn't. If he was right, I was stepping into dangerous territory.


End file.
